But even as I sat here thinking about that, thinking about the way he’d come into my room slick with blood,Daniel’s blood, my heart started to race.
Not with fear, or panic, but with something much darker.
Desire.
Lust.
Arousal.
I shook my head, banishing the unwanted thoughts, and sat on the bed. I lay back, pulling the blanket over my head, and groaned into the darkness.Waiting for time to pass down here was miserable. If it weren’t for the clock hanging over the dresser, I wouldn’t even know what time it was.
The hair on the back of my neck stood at attention, the feel of someone’s gaze on my back. Slowly, I pulled the blanket back, seeing Niko standing in front of me. His body was drenched, water seeping its way into the rug on the floor. A shiver crept down my spine as warmth pooled in my stomach. The sight of him made my clit throb with need, his eyes gazing down at me with hunger.
“You shared your feelings with me,” he blurted out, his chest heaving with each breath. “You opened up to me and let me in.”
I sat up and watched him pace the room. He stopped, sliding his hand over his face, and turned to me.
“Yeah, I did.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know,” I said, shaking my head. “I’ve never told anyone about that stuff. Not even Casey.”
“Do you trust me?”
I shrugged and sat back in the bed, leaning against the headboard.
“I don’t know, Niko.”
He let out a heavy sigh as he pressed his back against the wall and slid to the floor.
“I was raised by my father,” he said, his eyes darting between me and the wall. “But he wasn’t the loving, doting father that he pretended to be in front of everyone.”
Silence filled the room as he tried to gather himself. His breathing steadied, but the darkness in his eyes grew.
“He was vicious. I don’t remember a time when I wasn’t abused. You remember things from when you were young, but I blocked most of it outyears ago. Every once in a while, things will come back to me, things I wish wouldn’t. My father was the kind of man who got off on other people’s pain, especially mine.”
He laughed darkly, the pain in his eyes giving way to anger. His hands turned into fists, and I saw cuts and bruises lining his knuckles. I wanted to reach and stroke them, to give him some sense of comfort.
“He wasn’t a man at all, but a fucking coward.”
I stood from the bed and walked toward him, his face softening as I knelt in front of him.
“I wanted nothing more than to be loved by him, but the older I got, the more I realized he wasn’t capable of love. He always told me how big a disappointment I was to him. Not because of bad grades, or lack of trying, but because I was just… me.”
His words settled in the air around us as an ache slithered deep into my bones. I reached up and held his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.
“I killed him,” he whispered.
His eyes locked onto mine, and even as he said those words, I didn’t feel fear or panic. I felt…envious.
“And I don’t regret it. Not once in the last six years have I felt bad about what I did. What does that say about me?”
I chewed on my bottom lip, trying to find the right thing to say.
“I don’t know what it says about you, Niko. But I know from experience that parents are supposed to love and take care of you. When they’re the cause of all our pain it… breaks us.”
“I hadn’t spoken to him in two years. A week after I turned eighteen, he kicked me out. Then, out of the blue, he called me and asked me to come see him. When I got here, you know what it was that he wanted?”
