“Ok. I’ll be quiet then.”
“Good girl.” The nurse held a mask over Cassie’s face. “Breathe in and count backwards from one hundred.”
Cassie wanted to protest that she didn’t know how to count to one hundred forwards or backwards, but her eyes were growing heavy.
It was about a week later when Eleri finally gave Cassie clearance to start with some gentle movement. Since she couldn’t train with S’samph and the others yet, Cassie found herself visiting the pichari enclosures most mornings and helping Ailairi with their care. The old farmer didn’t ask questions and seemed grateful for her help, which was how she’d started collecting baskets of feathers for him while Kalai perched on her head or sometimes her shoulder. And then there was Örim. Always waiting for her after he finished teaching for the day.
When she glanced up toward the fence, Cassie noticed Örim already waiting for her. The school day must have let out early because he was there sooner than she was expecting him. He always seemed uncomfortable in the sun. His translucent aquamarine skin glinted in the bright light, but he kept his eyestones focused on her. She patted Kalai on her shoulder, who started squawking at the perceived intruder. Cassie hurried to finish her work while Örim switched to sitting on an outcropping of boulders on the side of the road. She brought the basket of feathers to Ailairi, who accepted it with a grateful strain of song.
“Thanks, Cassie.” He regarded Kalai on her head. “You can’t go home with her, you know.”
Kalai responded with an indignant whistling squawk, and Ailairi reached to detach the particular pichari from Cassie’shead. Her hair was still short enough so as not to tangle, but as it got longer, she’d have to figure out what to do about it. Growing it out long again would only remind her of what she’d lost every time she looked in the mirror. But she was keeping Örim waiting. After brushing a few loose feathers off her clothes, she climbed over the fence to greet him.
He rose from his seat as she approached. “Did you have a good day?” Örim asked while signing the words for ‘good’ and ‘day’.
Cassie acknowledged him with a tilt of her head.Ailairi taught me how to make a pillow using feathers.
“What is this sign?” Örim asked, mimicking the sign for ‘pillow’. Cassie found a small smile and then mimed sleeping.
“Sleeping? No, that doesn’t make sense. Pillow?”
She nodded. His hand was closer to hers now, but she resisted the urge to reach out and grab it, to feel the smooth angles of his fingers between hers. After he’d held her while she slept, she found herself emboldened, wanting more, but still not sure what more meant between them.
Cassie was startled when Örim closed the distance between them this time. His cool, smooth hand brushed against hers, softly enough it could have been an accident if he wasn’t staring at her with intention. Since she’d been here, since she’d met Örim, she couldn’t rid herself of strange, unfamiliar impulses. Those impulses sent her hand against his. Their fingers lacing together before she realized what it might mean.
Örim stared at her like he’d also never considered the implications of what they were doing. “You’re very warm.”
Flustered, Cassie made the hand sign for apology and tried to pull away.
“Sorry, no, I didn’t mean it like that.” He returned her grip. “I just wasn’t sure if you were overheating. It’s nice. Holding your hand is nice.”
This only succeeded in making Cassie more flustered, but she stopped trying to pull away.Your hand is smooth, she signed, although she wasn’t sure if she’d ever taught him the sign for ‘smooth’.
His fingers gripped hers a bit tighter, and she tried to figure out what he was thinking.
“Do you want to go back to my… our home?”
Cassie nodded affirmatively, feeling a strange bubbling sensation in her chest at the reminder that they were, in fact, sharing a living space. She’d shared a living space with others nearly her entire life, but this felt entirely different. Having Örim on the other side of the wall when she was trying to sleep or bathe or change clothing made her insides feel like they didn’t fit properly.
“I have a surprise for you when we get back,” Örim said.
Surprise?Cassie asked. Sometimes clients had brought surprise gifts for her, but they were usually hair pins or a new jar of lipstain. Once, someone had brought her some sweets from Brasnia Prime, but her fledglings had stolen most of them. All things were vetted through the Aviarist, so if anyone brought a larger or inappropriate gift, she likely wouldn’t have been allowed to see it. However, knowing Örim, she suspected his gift was some sort of device. Maybe an accessory for her datapad. Whatever it was, she was curious.
When they arrived back at their home, Örim led her inside to his workbench. “I made something for you.” Örim fumbled with something in a box. “It’s still a prototype, so it’ll need some calibration, but this should help you produce spoken words, if you want to, that is.”
Cassie stared at the device in his hands, not daring to believe what he was offering her. The greediness inside her wanted to snatch it and swallow it so no one could ever take it from heragain. Instead, she held out a hand with a cautious question in her eyes.I want to see, she signed.
“Here,” he looped the device around her neck and then pressed a button on the bottom. “It’s a little bit unwieldy. I had to get the camera input large enough to track your hands. Eventually, I’d like to link it with your wrist interface, but that’s a project for later. Let me show you how it works.”
He loaded something on his datapad. After a few moments, the device hummed. Örim made the hand signs for her name, and the device said, “Cassie.”
“Do you want to try?” Örim asked. “I programmed it using both correct spelling as well as phonetic pronunciation for unknown words, so it should be able to recognize any of your phonetic inputs. You might have to play around with the direct sign input, as it only recognizes the words you’ve taught me so far. It’s also a little finicky with the visual field. You’ll have to keep your hands in front of the box for it to work properly. We can work on it together.”
This was better than any sweet from Brasnia Prime. Any hair pin or lip stain. It was more than a gift. She started to move her hands in front of the device. It was something simple, something she’d always wanted to say as long as she’d had her voicelock. “My name is Cassie. I am definitely not cheerful.”
The voice was metallic and not very human sounding, but it was her words, spoken the way she wanted. Örim clapped his palm nodes together. “Excellent. I’m so glad it works. Like I said, it’s still a prototype, but we can work together on customizing it if you want.”
“Yes, please,” Cassie said. Even if he’d just made it to ease his guilt, it was still the nicest thing anyone had ever done for her. And Cassie realized he’d kept at least a version of his promise. It wasn’t the way she’d expected. But he’d given her a voice.
