“Never. But do not forget how I can control you. What good is power if you are dead?”
Chapter 21
Hauyne
TEO
Progress back to Enduvida is slow. With such a large party, what would’ve taken us one or two turns of the sun has easily turned into three or four.
While no one would fault the women who have come with us, it is a burden we are all happy to bear. There is a desperation that comes from having Estela back with me and not having more than a few moments alone. Adding in thirty-three women has made privacy a long-lost luxury.
All the tents that were brought have been sacrificed to the humans.
Niht has taken to going with the elves daily to hunt in order to supplement the stolen slave supplies. It takes a lot to feed around sixty people, especially when most are not yet sufficiently healed to assist with food preparations.
It’s quiet most days, much quieter than I would’ve expected. Everyone is tired and cold, and I can see many are drenched in pain, both emotional and physical. Estela spends every stopping point healing those she can. Several have infections, four arepregnant, and, just like the slaves from before, they are all malnourished.
She worries about herbs and fevers, and I worry about the cold. This has raised tensions in the camp and…
Estela.
She is returning to Rahda after hours of bandaging wounds.
Every thought always comes back to her.
She told me Mikal was gone when she went to save him, and now my beautiful mate looks… different. Not only has the hollowness returned to her face, but the look in her eye rips up my soul. I know the look of torture. I know fear.
In many ways, I worry that we are in a worse place than where we started.
I finish helping Ra'Salore set up the tents for the women to huddle inside.
One of the women approaches and gives us a long look. Her long dark hair is drawn over the side of her shoulder, and Ra'Salore eyes the unbound locks like a starved man seeing meat.
“You are very warm, as a people,” she says. “It would be nice if you would sleep inside the tents to raise the body temperature.”
Ra'Salore shakes his head. “We are too large.”
“I wouldn’t mind lying on top of you to help save space.” The woman grins.
The silent stone bender sputters. “I?—”
Niht comes over, a squirrel on his arm.
“Melisa, look!” He holds out the squirrel. “You said you liked these fluffy tail devils. Though, if you ask me, they are more rat than pet.”
The woman named Melisa laughs and holds out her arm. The pet scampers up and wraps around her neck.
I turn away from the chatter and find that Estela is gone. She’s likely back with thewomen.
I frown. We need a quiet, warm place to speak.
A part of me is frightened to peel away the layers of her mind and find out whatever is lurking beneath. Not because I am afraid to take on her pain, but because I worry about what it means to confront such emotions when this journey has brought out a great deal of brokenness in my own consciousness.
My one hope is that the two of us may carry each other’s pain together.
I wander away from the tents. When I find what I’m looking for, a cave with a warm, slightly sulphuric smell leaking out of it, my heartbeat increases.
As I push into the entrance, I find it mostly clean. It takes little time to use a discarded branch to sweep out any mess and tidy everything up. I lay down the sleeping roll I brought and take a deep breath.
