When I hear him at the door, I retreat to the service entrance and wait silently behind it.
Luceran enters. His boots strike the stone with heavy, measured steps. Winter follows him, sliding under the door and chilling my ankles. I hear the scrape of the chair, the shift of his weight as he sits, the low exhale he makes once he’s settled. A pleased sound.
My heart lifts, just for a moment.
Silverware clinks. Tea pours.
I push open the door.
His eyes snap to me instantly. His whole body goes rigid. His jaw clenches, nostrils flare, and he throws the silverware aside as if my presence has soured his appetite.
He slumps back into the chair with a heavy thud, arms hanging loose over its sides.
“What are you doing here? Get out.”
“Please,” I say, stepping closer.
“No.” His voice cracks like a whip. “Where is Atilia?”
“She has left,” I tell him. “I took care of your breakfast this morning.”
One of his eyebrows lifts as his tongue presses against his cheek. “I thought it tasted decidedly disappointing.”
Heat rises up my neck, but I don’t let him rattle me. Not when I finally understand the depth of what I’ve done.
“Please,” I try again. “I want to apologize. I never should have gone into that library.”
“But you did,” he snaps. “Just as you spoke out at the Aurevault. Just as you ran onto the lake.” His hands clamp around the arms of the chair as he leans forward, the collar of his linen shirt falling open, runes blazing across the hard planes of his chest.
“You areexhausting, Neve Devlin,” he says, voice low and furious. “Your defiance is infuriating. Your presence in this castle is a disruption. A pounding headache I cannot escape.” His gaze burns straight through me. “Bargaining for your service in exchange for your father’s debt was, without question, the worst decision of my long existence.”
I remind myself I am here to apologize. I reminded myself of that too late. My mouth opens and words tumble out.
“Oh, because it was such a glorious day formeand my father?” I snap. “Do you know how much I miss him? How worried I am? Do you think Ienjoyyou screaming at me? Constantly threatening the mines? Turning into a wolf and pouncing on me while somemonster crawls beneath the lake?” My voice rises, every word trembling with the weight I’ve carried for weeks. “I’m infuriating?Please. It is you who has made a sport out of frightening me. You make me miserable on purpose.”
He exhales loudly, dramatically, like he’s bored with the entire conversation. “Then why are you here? Why serve me this foul breakfast? Why apologize at all if I am so cruel?”
“Because I was wrong to go into the library,” I choke out, all the frustration and guilt and aching sadness surging forth in one unstoppable rush. “I didn’t know what it meant to you. I didn’t know it belonged to your wife. That it was all you have left of her.”
His eyes flash. His shoulders lock. A sharp breath expands his chest, but he holds it, frost curling off his skin in thin, furious ribbons.
“I disturbed a place that was sacred to you,” I say softly. “I was careless, and I amsorry.”
His jaw ticks. “Humans… you…”
“Yes!” I cut him off before he can belittle me. “Humans. The creatures you think are lesser. But with all your power, with all your beauty, your immortality, your ancient knowledge, you will never feel in a century what we feel in asingle day.” My voice breaks. “I pity you.”
The chair crashes backward as he surges to his feet. The table groans beneath his grip, veins standing out along his corded muscles like lightning beneath translucent skin.
“Pity me?”
“Yes!” My voice matches his fury. I don’t back down. I won’t. “Because for all your years, you will never feel as fiercely or as passionately as we do.”
His lips part. Something raw slips through his expression. “You know nothing of my ferocity,” he mutters, stepping toward me. His gaze pins me in place, steals the breath from my lungs. “You know nothing of my passion.” His hands peel away from the table, trembling. “You know nothing of myloss.”
He turns sharply, pacing to the far end of the room, his hair sweeping behind him.
I swallow hard. My heart thunders. “But I do,” I say quietly. “Loss. I understand it. My mother…”
