I lean in closer, tracing her jawline with my thumb. “How’s the weather inside you?”
“Fine,” she responds hastily, her reply almost automatic.
“And how is it really?”
She takes a deep breath, her shoulders drooping as the façade begins to crack. For a moment, she looks past me to the others standing a few feet away, engrossed in their own conversation, oblivious to ours.
Their laughter and distant chatter drift toward us on the wind, but here, between us, the air is thick with unspoken words.
“Ladybug?” I press again, softer this time.
She closes her eyes for a moment, then begins to speak, her voice shaking a little. “The weather inside me is… a mess,” she admits. “It’s like a sky full of storm clouds while the sun is setting. Dark clouds are swirling, thundering, and pouring cold rain everywhere.”
“I’m so sorry I hurt you.” Caressing her cheek, I hope she can hear the truth in my words.
Never was I ever that sorry.
When she opens her eyes and looks at me, they’re glistening with unshed tears, a deeper blue than I’ve seen before, and she continues to speak, “But then again, sunlight breaks through, stubborn and bright. Those rays fight through the darkness, casting little rainbows…” She pauses and gives me a small smilethat makes my heart ache. “It’s a crazy mix, with the storm raging on but the sun refusing to give up. And my sky is caught in the middle. I want to believe in the sun, to let its light chase away the storm. But right now, the clouds are thick and heavy, and the rain just keeps coming down. I don’t know if my sky will ever be clear again.”
My shoulders tense while I’m fighting the urge to do something—anything—to take away her pain, but I’m powerless, standing here, frozen by the depth of her struggle.
“So, that’s the weather inside me. It has gone mad. Just like me, it seems, because even though it hurts having you here, you leaving would hurt so much more.”
“We’re not going anywhere without you. I promise,” I whisper, reaching down to hold her hand, my heart pounding so hard I can feel it in my throat as I look into Amelia’s tear-filled eyes. My usual charm, which I’ve relied on for so long, completely fails me, and I find myself stumbling over my words like a nervous teenager on his first date.
“Amelia, I… God, I’m such an idiot. You know me, right? I’m the guy who always loses shit. My keys, my phone, my wallet… I swear I spend half my life searching for things I’ve misplaced. It’s like I’ve got some sort of curse or something.” I run my free hand through my wind-messy curls, a nervous habit I can’t shake. “But losing you? That’s something I can’t handle. Because somewhere along the way, I lost my heart to you. And unlike my keys or my phone, I don’t want it back. It’s yours, completely.” My thumb caresses the back of her hand, and her skin is soft, warm. Her pulse races beneath my fingertips, matching my own frantic heartbeat.
Amelia’s eyes flicker with a complex mix of emotions—hope, fear, love—as the wind picks up around us, tossing her hair lightly, and I have to talk a little louder to make sure she hears every word she needs to hear. “I know I screwed up. What wedid was wrong, and I’m so,sosorry. But being with you… it’s like finding a piece of myself I didn’t even know was missing. You make me feel whole, complete in a way I’ve never experienced before. It’s like you’ve filled this void I didn’t even realize was there.”
I’ve never been good at expressing my feelings, at least not the complicated ones, but for Amelia, I’m willing to lay my heart bare. “I can’t lose you, Amelia. I’ve lost so many things in my life… losing you would break me. You’re the one thing I can’t afford to misplace. Please give me… giveusa chance to make this right. I promise, I’ll spend every day trying to be worthy of your trust again. I’ll do whatever it takes, no matter how long it takes.”
Amelia pushes away a stray tear that escaped with the back of her hand, and I reach out to take it and bring her hand to my lips, pressing a soft kiss to her knuckles. Her skin is salty from the tear, and it breaks my heart to know I’m the cause of her pain. “I’m sorry. From the bottom of my heart, I’m sorry. And I swear, if you give me the chance, I’ll prove to you that I can be the man you deserve. I’ll work on myself. I’ll be better. Because you’re worth it, Amelia. You’re worth everything to me.”
Holding her hand, I wait, hoping for a word, any sign that she might feel the same way, that she might see a future for us. Her lips part, ready to respond?—
“Amelia!”
Two more minutes, Goddammit.
She looks over her shoulder to where the others are, then back at me, and her mouth opens again to speak.
“Come on, Meelie, don’t dawdle!” August calls again, obviously not happy to see us missing from the group.
“Coming!” she calls back, her voice carrying across the wind. Then, she quickly leans in, her lips pressing a soft kiss on mycheek, and I have to restrain myself from reaching out and pulling her in for a real kiss.
“Thank you for the Twizzlers,” she whispers next to my ear.
It’s okay.
That’s enough.
All I wanted today was to apologize, to lay my feelings out in the open. Now, she needs time to process, and I need to prove that my words aren’t just words.
This is fine.
“Let’s get back before August sends out a search party,” I quip, lighter than I feel.
She laughs, a genuine one, so I step ahead on the path, reaching back with my hand and wiggling my fingers at her.
