I force a smile. “Sure, I just didn’t sleep much, and now my boss is on my case. I can’t come to lunch today. Sorry. I need to finish some things before the weekend.”
Oliver nods, but his eyes remain fixed on me. There’s something different about him today, but I can’t quite place it. Did Misha tell him?
Is he mad at me?
“Lunch, sure… but I’m here because of something else.”
My stomach sinks. Is he here to tell me that we can’t be friends after what happened? Guilt and fear claw at me, and tears prick at the corners of my eyes. “Oliver…”
He steps closer, pulling me to stand in front of him. His hand comes up to cup my cheek, and his touch is so gentle it almost breaks me. It’s so intimate, so unexpected, and yet it feels like it’s where I’ve always belonged. “It’s something good, I promise.”
I swallow hard, my heart pounding. “O-Okay. What is it?”
He grins, a spark of mischief in his eyes. “I decided that my birthday this year is going to be tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” I repeat, surprised. “That sounds amazing, but it’s a little short notice to get you a present.”
“Oh, I know what I want,” he murmurs, and the fluttering starts up in my chest again. The way he’s looking at me, with that mixture of affection and something more, something hungry, sends a shiver down my spine.
“What?” I ask on a whisper.
“Go on a date with me?” he asks, his eyes locking onto mine. “The Night of Books at the Forgotten Bookmark bookstore downtown.”
“I—” He’s asking me out? It’s like he’s shed his shy, reserved demeanor. He’s even standing taller. But even if I want this so badly, I can’t. Not before I’m sure he knows. “Oliver, I have to tell you something first. I?—”
“I know,” he interrupts, his eyes filled with understanding and determination. “I know, and I don’t care. Amelia… I want to spend my birthday with you. I want to hold your hand while we stroll through the store and you show me your favorite books. I want to sit and listen to you read to me while I eat snacks.”
I laugh despite the tears forming in my eyes. I don’t know whether I’m laughing because it sounds so wonderful or because I’m terrified of what this means. Terrified of what I’m becoming—a woman torn between three men she loves.
“Go out with me?” he asks again, his voice filled with hope.
A hope I feel, too, even as the turmoil inside me grows.
“I would love to.”
As Oliver pulls me into a hug, his warmth envelops me in a way that feels comforting and right. I close my eyes, savoring the feeling of being in his arms. But even as I cling to him, another wave of worry crashes over me.
Am I making an even bigger mess of everything right now?
Oliver, Misha, Grey…
How did I let myself fall for all three? And how do I keep from breaking all of our hearts?
THIRTY-THREE
Take a deep breath,Ollie.
I stand in front of Amelia’s door, my heart pounding.
Saying I’ve been dreaming about this moment for the last two years is an understatement. And now that it’s here, I’m more nervous than I’ve ever been.
I was ready an hour ago, too anxious to sit still, so I spent the time writing a letter to her, sorting through my feelings about Misha, and what I figured out surprised me.
The only real jealousy I feel, besides the fact thatshemade the first move on him, is over his ease with everything—sex, kissing, dating—I have no experience whatsoever with.
Misha has had some relationships over the years. The women he brought home were nice but never stayed long. The last one was so long ago that I can’t even remember what she looked like. Grey, on the other hand, never dates and never talks about it. However, I know he has the occasional dalliance that he keeps to himself.
Which makes me the odd one out.
