“You wanna go again?” Mikey asked. He’d pulled off his goggles and was watching him with steady, challenging eyes. “Because if it’ll help you shift whatever’s gotten you so riled, I’m good for another race.”
No shit. Of course Mikey would be good for another race. He was young and had superhuman powers in the pool. Shane pulled off his own goggles and wiped his eyes. He’d never been jealous of Mikey.Never!But today, he felt like punching his friend in the jaw just because...because...fuck it. Just because he was the only guy around to punch.
“Let’s hit the weights.” Shane sprang out of the pool and grabbed his towel off the bench.
“So I see that a week hiking in our great outdoors did you a world of good.” Mikey followed him out of the pool. “And you say you didn’t end up asking Zoey to join you?”
“Nope.”
“So who did you ask?”
“No one.” Shane pushed through the door of the changing room. If Mikey couldn’t be bothered to look on his social media more than once in a blue moon, it wasn’t Shane’s job to fill him in. “So you sorted out that sponsorship deal with your dad?”
“Yeah, Dad arranged it. Howie, my agent, finalized the contract.” Mikey reached for a fresh towel off a hook on the side. “So, whoever you took hiking was a headache, right?”
Damn, the change of subject didn’t work. “How do you know I didn’t go alone?”
“Because I figured you would’ve said.”
“Well, I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Yeah, I figured that much already too, buddy.” Mikey pulled on a T-shirt. “It’s a beautiful morning. Instead of weights, let’s run around Stanley Park.”
“Great idea.” Shane snatched up his shorts and running shoes, and to his relief, Mikey didn’t mention the Rockies again. They finished dressing in silence then headed outside and up along Beach Avenue.
Monday morning commuters were busily walking and cycling to their offices. Traffic beeped and rolled by. Sunshine sparkled on the water of English Bay, bringing to mind the lakes of the Rockies he and Krista had hiked last week.
He still couldn’t quite believe what had happened yesterday morning at that service station. Still couldn’t believe that Krista would forget all about what they’d shared together and leap into Ryan’s arms without a second thought.
But then, Shane hadn’t believed Fiona could cheat on him for two bloody years either. That day at the church, he hadn’t believed that she’d meant any of the words he was hearing.
I’m sorry, Shane. I love him more.
Shane picked up his pace. Beside him, Mikey did the same. They turned right down Chilco Street, heading toward Coal Harbour. When they got to the 0km marker of the Stanley Park Seawall path, Shane cast a sideways glance at Mikey. Mikey side-eyed him back, and soon they were locked in an unspoken race, overtaking walkers and joggers, dodging roller-skaters and anyone else who got in their way.
The nine km path ran along the water’s edge. After his drills in the pool, Shane would often run it as a post-training workout. The scenery was magnificent. But today, Krista’s face lighting up with delight as she read Ryan’s love texts was all he could see.
And all he could feel was a constant gnawing in his core. Although another man’s mouth on Krista’s was definitely chewing Shane up inside, what chewed him more was what a gutless, chicken-shitty coward he’d been. Why hadn’t he been brave enough to tell Krista he wanted to continue seeing her? Why hadn’t he told her how he’d felt that last night in the Rockies, when he’d been gazing out into the night, lonely and scared of getting hurt again?
But wouldn’t Krista still have chosen Ryan anyway?
And shouldn’t Shane be happy that she had? After all, his new life plan didn’t include women. He was the one who’d said,No thinking, and wouldn’t even entertain the thought of starting something more with her.
Dammit, he was so confused! His confusion had made him act like such a shithead at the service station too, giving Krista her bags back like she’d meant nothing to him. He’d been too pissed off and afraid at the time to stick around. Too worn out with his hang-ups from the past to put up a fight for her.
Propelled by misery and anger, Shane pumped his arms and legs harder. Mikey was right next to him, but by the 8km mark, Shane dug deeper. He found that pot of energy that made him one of Australia’s top athletes and got to the last marker three strides ahead of his friend. He’d won the stupid race, but what a joyless, pointless victory it was.
Pain shot through his legs and his chest, and both he and Mikey were panting and coughing like sick dogs.
You should’ve told her how you feel.
And now it’s too late.
“Man”—Mikey wheezed, his head hanging between his knees—“do I happen to know this person who’s gotten you so pissed?”
“Yeah.” Shane swallowed past the burn in his throat. “You’re looking straight at him.”
***
