“Do you know where he is?”
“No! Of course, I bloody don’t.” Helen threw her hands in the air. “What do you take me for? The police questioned me half the night. I told them everything I knew, which obviously wasn’t much seeing it was Nazir who toldmewhat Jaxon had been up to. For god’s sake, I worked with him for nearly two years and I didn’t even know he had a bloody wife.”
Something in the way she spat out the wordwifegripped Seb’s stomach. “Were you and Jaxoninvolved?”
“No, I told you, there hasn’t been anyone except you for a very long time.” But after a long pause, she sat back and sighed. “Jaxon was good to me. I loved the work he gave me, the money, and what I thought was his friendship. As Ada got weaker and weaker, he lightened the load. We were never lovers, but yes, for a while, I wanted more from him.”
Helen’s words echoed in the twilight. Seb toed the weeds that pushed through the cracks in the stone paving, trying to figure out what to do.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before, Sebastian. I wanted to, but at first you were having such a hard time with me not being Cassie, and then when we started getting on, I didn’t want to ruin that.”
Something tugged tight in Seb’s chest again—a warning to take flight or an urgency to stay? He’d never felt so mixed-up over a woman before, let alone one that was built on such contradictions and opposites. Helen was naughty and nice, intelligent yet foolish. Caring and faithful but so damned dismissive of basic law and order.
What the hell was he gonna do with this rebel fairy?
“I really am sorry, Sebastian,” she said again, reaching out to him. “This wasn’t exactly the surprise I had planned to celebrate your contract.”
Oh, Christ, his contract!
Lutz Voigt’s warning to keep away from any bad publicity dropped like an ax between them.
Seb placed his hands on her shoulders. “I need to know what you’ll do if Jaxon Bates does make contact again.”
“He won’t. He’s gone.”
“Helen?” Seb held her face between his hands, forcing her gaze to meet his. “What will you do?”
“I’ll tell the police, of course.” Without blinking, she looked straight back at him. “I promise you, I will.”
Chapter 26
Abusycoupleofdays passed after Helen had told Sebastian about Jaxon and the police. More parcels from Alexa arrived so she kept her head down with her work while Sebastian attended meetings in London which, although they’d been on the calendar for a while, didn’t ease Helen’s suspicion that Sebastian was avoiding her, and everything she’d told him.
On Friday, Helen got the bus into the city. It was Bristol’s Hot Air Balloon Fiesta weekend and she’d arranged to meet Tom, Emma and the kids on Clifton Down. Since Helen and Tom’s first summer in Somerset, when they’d been so dazzled by the hot-air balloons that had drifted over the orchards, watching the fiesta’s first evening mass ascension from the top of the gorge had become their annual ritual.
Helen passed the suspension bridge, that first random and disastrous night with Sebastian at the inaugural dinner coming back to mind. Out of the chaos, they’d forged a relationship—a connection—which now threatened to return to that same slippery starting block of mistrust and misunderstanding.
I’m not the woman you’re looking for.
Helen picked her way through the crowds waiting for takeoff and spotted Tom by the Observatory. Harry was sitting on his lap and Emma, cradling Lucy, leaned against him. Tom nuzzled Emma’s neck, holding his family close, and Helen halted mid-step—envy mixed unnervingly with the warm fuzzy feelings in her stomach.
Forcing a bright smile, she joined her brother and his cute family on the picnic blanket and asked about their day. Tom, still crisp in his suit, had come straight from the office and Emma had spent the afternoon in the city with friends.
“What time is Sebastian getting here?” Emma asked.
Helen checked her phone. Sebastian had stayed over in London the past three nights and was due to get the train back to Bristol this morning to then head straight into meetings with Brenda. She hadn’t heard from him since yesterday when he’d texted to say he’d meet her here after finishing up at the Get Living Center. “He should be here any minute.”
Harry handed her a sticky piece of banana.
“Thank you, darling.” She popped it into her mouth, made somenom-nom-nomsounds, then noticed the sweet, tender kiss Tom instinctively planted on Emma’s forehead.
Warm fuzzies mixed with envy again, forcing Helen to recognize what had been hitting her over the head these past few days.
Just Sex wasn’t enough anymore.
She’d known it the other night, during the walk back home from the manor house when Sebastian had gone into fulluptight sergeant majormode, giving her—and himself—the pep talk of the century.Okay, Hobbs, we only havetwo more public events to attend … No one will find out about this … I’ll be going back home next month …
Helen was left feeling empty and depressed knowing he viewed the next five weeks as a challenge, to get through his remaining time in England without her fucking everything up for him, whereas she’d hoped—
