Heat flooded my face. I deserved his fury, but what I delayed telling him had my stomach tipping over and nausea creeping up my throat. My mind flipped back to the woman who had come to see me at the store. Keeping my gaze on his scuffed boots, I wrapped my arms around my waist, trying to hold myself together, only to relive the entire, horrible moment again.
“Kate was annoyed that my design wasn’t up to par for her new boutique. She insisted I start from scratch, but I couldn’t. My mind was all over the place when a woman walked into the office…”
When he said nothing, I settled my gaze on his inked arms folded over his chest. “She said I was bad for you.”
“What?”
At his sharp tone, I met incensed green eyes now edged with confusion. “She said she was your therapist. If she mentioned her name, I don’t recall. But she was very clear, said you always came to her foreverything.” I stressed the last word, so he understood exactly what I meant.
At his harsh expletive, my heart shriveled and died a little more. It was true.
He jammed his fingers through his hair, a nerve pounding hard in his jaw. The place where my name was stained on his inner arm was starting to fade… Like my relationship with him? More pain bled into me.
“Jean Creswell,” he said after a moment. Tone flat. “That’s her name. My father had hauled me off to see her soon after the accident. I was seventeen…I didn’t talk to her then, not like you’re supposed to with a shrink, and I still don’t. I have never lied to you, Logan, about anything. I was so messed up, trying to silence my inner demons, I sought oblivion any way I could. Liquor, fighting, and sex. I was on a downward spiral into a place of no return. A few days after I turned eighteen, she stroked my arm, and that started. A month later, I told her I wasn’t interested...”
His lips pressed together into an unhappy line. Dull green eyes held mine. “Yeah, I still see her, but only for the meds. Don’t let this come between us, Logan. When you’re not with me, the fragments you helped heal collapse, pulling me back into this void. I can’t even see straight. It’s why I left San Francisco. Those months in Peru as a volunteer, I lived in a remote, storm-damaged village, and helped fix the rundown buildings. I did drudge work, and they offered food and the room I shared with the other helpers. They liked who I was.
“But my nightmares never stopped. The nights were the worst. I couldn’t take it—it was swallowing me whole. I came back to the city, and you walked into my life, and my damaged parts started to mend.”
But not heal.
“You don’t talk to her because you don’t trust her,” I said quietly.
He was silent for a moment. His gaze lowered to the ground then came back to mine. “I’m sorry she confronted you. She had no business doing that. You’re probably right. I’ll find a new therapist.”
“I want you to get better.”
He heaved a massive sigh. “I want that, too.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t come straight to you. I was so angry with her, with you, and hurting when she said what she did. I came here to calm down, to clear my mind and think.”
“We’re bound to hit stumbling blocks, but we have to talk to each other.”
“I know that…” Now. I had a tendency to shore up my troubles and hope things would right themselves in time. Devyn hadn’t been the type to talk about stuff. He liked it all smooth sailing. After a fight, he’d pretend it never happened. And then there was Max…
“C’mere.”
I leaped into his arms, taking him back a step. He hit his SUV.
A loud grunt. “You’re heavy.”
At his teasing, I sobbed out a laugh. Tears stung my eyes as he tightened his hold on me.
God knew, despite my confusion and pain, my feelings for him overwhelmed me. That was why I’d taken it so hard when that woman popped out of the woodwork and tried to lay claim to him.
I pressed my face in his neck, breathing in his scent. Max had never betrayed me. In spite of all my uncertainties, he was always there when I needed him. He never wavered. “I’m so sorry, Max.”
“I understand, Logan, more than you realize.” He eased back and his gaze met mine. “I’ll give you all the time you need. As long as it’s me you come back to…”
My tears threatened to fall. He deserved better, not someone like me, so filled with fear.
“…because I’m crazy in love with you.”
I froze. My heart crashed against my ribs, the sound a roar in my head. “Wh-what?”
“I love you, Logan. How could I not? You’re smart, beautiful, and amazing. Even when you’re driving me crazy, I want to yank you into my arms and kiss you senseless…” A smile. “I love the way you’re addicted to old movies. And especially, the way you dance when you think no one’s watching. I love it all because it’s you.”
“Max—”
