“What?” Confusion edged his tone, but he continued keeping me trapped against him, despite my struggles. “I promised you I would never cheat. I didn’t. Logan—” he grasped my face in one of his huge palm, making me look at him. “That was probably a friend of Jack’s using my old room. When I got here, the party was in full swing. I didn’t feel like going inside, so I just sat in my Jeep. Hurting, because of the way I left you, and I’m only guilty for that dick move, only that—”
“Stop!” I glared at him, not wanting to hear any more. “Your Jeep was empty. You weren’t in there.”
“Because I had my seat in a reclining position. God, Logan, I’m crazy about you—don’t you get that? When the house door slammed, I jerked upright and thought I was dreaming you. I called out, but you didn’t hear me. You ran past so fast, I realized what must have happened and came after you.”
I looked behind him, the house was silent, no one was stirring. The Jeep door was flung open. And through the pain fog clouding my mind, I realized he was fully dressed. No way could he have hauled on his clothes, boots included, and followed me this fast. And the tears started to fall again. “I thought—I thought…I hit you.”
“I hardly felt it.” He cupped my face with both palms now. Darkened green eyes held mine. “I would never intentionally hurt you, Logan. You are embedded so deep in here”—he slapped his chest—“it would mean destroying myself, too.”
He wiped away my tears with his thumb, and I swiped my nose with my shirt hem.
“C’mon.” He dropped his arm around my shoulders and led me back to the Jeep. As we neared the house, the door opened, and a guy with short, light blond hair, andcolorfullyinked sleeves, stormed out. He shot Max a malevolent glare and got on a bike.
A redhead stumbled to the door wearing only a long t-shirt, cried out, “Ryan, wait—” Then she glanced at us and froze as the guy ignored her and tore off up the street.
“She’s the one who called your name,” I whispered. “Who is she?”
Max barely spared her a look. “Honestly, I don’t recall.”
On the ride back, I brooded, the pieces finally connecting. That girl was probably an old hookup and, even if Max didn’t recall who she was, the biker guy’s resemblance to him said it all. She was still hung-up on Max.
I understood it was his past, and it was over, but still, it left a gaping hole inside me—brought back painful memories of my shattered experience.
Max took my hand from my lap to rest on his thigh. “I’m right here, Logan, don’t shut me out because of a misassumption.”
I dragged my gaze from staring out the side window to him. His mouth tightened when I remained silent.
A short while later, we arrived at the apartment. I made my way to the kitchen, my head pounding from my crying jag. I switched on the light and blinked at the sudden brightness.
Max, who followed quietly behind me, spun me to him and held me so tightly the air rushed out of my lungs. He buried his face in my nape. “I’m sorry, Logan. I’m sorry about this morning, for being such a bastard when I know you only wanted to help, and for what you went through at Jack’s.”
A wobbly breath escaped me, and I put my arms around him. I didn’t want to think about the horrible fight or what happened after, and worse, my own insecurities. “I didn’t mean to push so hard, I was scared and worried about you.”
He remained silent, his chest rising and falling, and when I thought he wouldn’t speak, he said, “The headaches started soon after the accident. …” He let me go and leaned against the counter to stare out through the darkened window. “As the months passed and with the lack of sleep, the headaches grew worse, and that’s when I started taking the pills.”
Trying to ignore the hammering in my own head, I asked, “It doesn’t help you sleep?”
He shook his head. “No, nothing does. If I do, it’s in snatches. They’re just really strong pain meds,” he admitted.
My gaze drifted over his haggard features and realized the truth. It wasn’t just the accident or not remembering that was taking a toll, it was him not sleeping, too. “Did the doc not say what causes the headaches?”
He shrugged. “Except for slicing this open”—he rubbed the scar on his eyebrow—“they couldn’t find anything medically wrong. Said I needed to learn to relax and sleep, it should help ease the pain. They prescribed sleeping pills, but those just held me trapped in my nightmares. My mind wide awake. Hated that shit…”
The strain lines etched around his mouth were pronounced. Fatigue and pain had dulled his gorgeous eyes to a murky green. He continued to rub his brow.
Max didn’t know how to relax, not mentally anyway…because he couldn’t, not with his tragic past haunting him. Maybe there was something I could do for him.
“Come, let’s go upstairs.”
“Let me have a quick shower first, ‘kay?” He straightened from the counter. “Cold water soothes me.”
And I wasn’t much help with my breakdown, was I?
“Okay.”
After Max had left, I retrieved the Advil from the cupboard, took two and swallowed them with water. Back in the bedroom, I straightened the sheets and the covers. Bed tidied, I shut the windows then changed into sleep shorts and a tee and sat down to wait for Max.
A few minutes later, he walked in, a towel draped low around his waist. Raking his fingers through his damp hair, he sat beside me. “You okay?”
