My mind in turmoil, I made my way to my studio. The strong smell of turpentine and oils greeted me. From the undraped bay window, daylight streamed inside, giving me the natural lighting I sometimes needed. A blue futon sat at one end of the room, and on the other, my canvases and easels waited. A shelf along the wall held rows of paint tubes and two wooden containers with various sizes and types of brushes.
My cell rang. When I saw the name on the display, the daze Max had left me in dissipated, and a smile took over. I hit answer and speaker at once and set the phone on the table. “Mom, how are you?” I asked, setting up for Gus’s appointment. I selected the oil colors and brushes I would need. “Did the visit to the doc go well?”
“I’m fine, La, stop fussing,” she scolded. “Are you coming home with Ray next weekend? It’s the fair, and you know how Ray and y…your dad are about these charity-driven events.”
At the slight hesitation and slur in her voice, my chest ached. She’d been through so much in the last couple of years. The second stroke she’d suffered two years ago had taken its toll. Therapy helped. But she’d never be the same again.
Ray and I tried to go home as often as we could. Recently, with Kate’s deadlines, I hadn’t made the trip. Butthisvisit…it meant spending time at the fair, and I wasn’t ready for that.
“I’m not sure, Mom. I have three window designs to finish—”
“Every time you’ve b…been home, you’ve only stayed for a few hours. I know it’s hard being here, with what Devyn did, but you have to put the past behind you, d…darling. Get closure and live again. Meet new people.”
“I know...” I inhaled deeply, biting my thumb nail. My mind drifted to Max. Hastily, I shut him out. “I’ll try, Mom.”
And as she chattered on about the ladies group she belonged to, another truth hit me. Despite the knocks life had handed her since she’d turned twenty, being diagnosed with type one diabetes and high blood pressure, then recently, the strokes that took their toll,shewas determined to live her life.
Unlike me.
After Mom had ended the call, I logged into my bank account on my cell. And made the payment, a measly two thousand dollars. At this rate, the outstanding balance—a quarter of a million—would take decades to pay off.
My stomach heaved. I prayed this friend of Pierre’s who wanted to hire me would be the answer to my financial troubles so I could ease the burden on the people I loved.
Max
Seated in the back of Mulligan’s Bar, Jack glowered at his fourth or fifth beer. No point in asking him what was wrong. It could only be home, but he never said shit unless he wanted to.
War was sucking face with some girl in the back. At least he’d found a way to kill time until his suspension was over. We’d met in junior high, when his fists came crashing into my face, missing the dickhead he was aiming for. It was just before the accident. Hell, I never walked away from a fight. I welcomed it. And we were both slapped with detention. Later, I found out the football team assholes were messin’ around with the new hockey guy.
War and I banded together, Jack jumped in. Yeah, we settled the score with those dumbasses. Bruised, bleeding, and victorious, we’d become friends, and had cemented the deal with our first ink. Me, a demon ram with the requisite curly horns for my star sign. I was rockin’ high on adrenaline and way cool.
I swallowed another mouthful of Heineken as my restlessness hiked. Ever since I’d kissed Logan this afternoon, I’d been unable to stop thinking about her.Not that I ever could, I thought darkly.
When she was around, I didn’t feel so dead inside. For a brief moment, she’d even made me forget the shit in my life.
That day with the kids, she was friendly, more open, but the moment it was only us, her walls went back up. Frowning, I pushed the nutshells on the table around with my beer bottle. Why was she so wary around me? No matter my teasing or how much I wanted her, I wouldn’t force myself on her…
Or was it just guys in general? What the hell had her ex done?
Only one person could answer that. I scanned and found my target at the bar. Ray was working tonight. People got out of my way as I headed for her. Good. My visible skin art always had them reacting that way. Sure, they were of the dark, scary sort. But they were damn fine ones. Hell, the musical notes should sweeten the whole outlook. Whatever.
“Hey.” Ray grinned when she saw me. “You want a refill?”
I shook my head, changing my mind about grilling her. Ray was about as communicative as a damn tree stump when it came to her sister. Beside, she’d warned me off. Not interested in more of the same, I said, “Lend me your cell for a sec, I need to make a call. My batteries are down.” A lie.
“Sure.” She handed her phone over and disappeared with her order. I went through her contacts and then rang Logan. She answered on the third ring. “Ray—” At her breathy voice, my tense stomach muscles eased. “I can’t talk now.”
“It’s me. Are you done with the silver fox?”
“Max?” Her tone turned husky with surprise. “Yep, a while ago.”
“Good. Get a cab and come over to Mulligan’s.”I’ll find a way to make her talk to me.
“I can’t…” Another pause. “I have to go, Charli needs me.” She hung up.
She was out with someone else? Anger buzzing through me, the urge to put my fist through the counter took hold. My fingers fisted around Ray’s cell, I headed for my friends.
“He won’t do it.” War’s slurring tone finally pierced the haze in my skull. He was back, but there was no sign of his groupie. With no idea what the hell my two drunken friends were having a pissing contest about—nor giving a shit—thoughts of getting smashed took over.
