He pauses mid-bite and lowers the apple. “Anything specific?”
Staring down at my apple, I shake my head slowly. “Just… ominous.”
When I look back at him, his lips are pressed together before he takes another bite out of his apple. “Is there anything that youseewhen you have these ominous feelings?”
“No.” I sign more firmly than I mean to.
A silent apology ghosts over Kilkenny’s face. “I don’t mean to pressure you,” he motions. “Alys says that Dreamwalkers sometimes also have the gift of sight. Like an oracle.”
I wrinkle my nose and shake my head. “No gift of sight here. It’s just… it feels wrong to make my way to safety when…” Taig didn’t have a chance. I cannot finish the sentence aloud, and grief grips me again.
Kilkenny nods. “I know.”
I’ve already let myself break once, and it was much needed. Now I need to hold it together until we get to the Verge.
Kilkenny tosses his apple core a small distance away, and I idly follow its trail as it lands in the grass.
My jaw drops. “How on earth did you finish that apple already?”
A small burst of laughter escapes him. “I was hungry.” He smiles and shrugs.
“Youjuststarted eating it.”
He presses a fist over his mouth to stifle his laughter, glancing at the other two who are still fast asleep. Then he scoots closer to me, the side of his hip against mine. He puts an arm around me, and I let my head rest on his shoulder as he holds me close. His warmth erases the chill in my body.
“I’m worried about Carys,” I say aloud.
His reluctance is evident as he slowly releases me and gives us just a bit of space for communication. “So am I,” he signs.
“I wish we could rescue her the way she rescued me and Alys. I hate that there’s nothing we can do about the horrors she’s enduring.”
“I know.” His shoulders slump, his jaw tightening.
My teeth sink into my lower lip. “Do you believe in prophecies? And don’t say ‘I know.’”
A small smile curves his lips. “I do.” He tucks a bit of stray hair behind his ear.
“Do you believe that Carys is an actual descendant of Agryna?” I sign. “Is that even possible after the Purge?”
He wrinkles his nose. “Perhaps.”
I squint at him as the teeniest of smiles plays on his lips. “How can you possibly be amused at a time like this? There is so much to figure out. So much I don’t understand. Carys is being tortured, and the whole kingdom may be in peril.”
There’s such a softness in his gaze that I want to weep again just as I had back at the Dead Man’s Inn. “You cannot bear the weight of the entire kingdom on your shoulders. You place everyone’s needs andwoes above your own until there’s no room for your own thoughts in there.” He gently taps my forehead, and I sigh.
“It’s easier to focus on other people’s woes rather than my own.” The words slip past my lips without permission, and I cringe.
He tilts his head at me and puts his hand on my knee. “Then maybe you ought to share some of your own woes with someone. Perhaps a certain killjoy who happens to be rather fond of you?”
My chest flutters pleasantly. “You’re rather fond of me, hmm?”
“Did I say that?” He looks so bewildered.
Have I misunderstood? I frown at him, but then a slow, teasing smile melts onto his face.
I smile back. “Well… you’realright, I guess.”
He grins, nudging my shoulder gently with his, but it’s futile to have any sort of attachment to this man. Never in my life have I been physically attracted to anyone, let alone contemplated what it would be like to have a relationship that goes beyond friendship. Now is not the time for such thoughts.
