I roll my eyes and huff a laugh. “In fact, she didnot. Leanna is of the opinion that I am more appealing to men if those things remain somewhat of a mystery. And she has every intention of utilizing that naivete in whatever way she can.”
Even I can hear the bitterness in my voice at my admission that Leanna continues to mold me for her own ends. Perhaps leaving me lacking in a way that I never expected.
Vakesh buries his face between his hands and shakes his head.
“I’m not completely ignorant,” I reassure him. “I do understand the … act.” I flush despite myself.
“Theact?” He blanches.
“The expectation,” I say, hoping it is an appropriate correction, as Ithrow my arms in the air.
“Stars above,” he swears, looking up as if he is offering a silent prayer to the heavens.
“Why are we even talking about this?” I sigh deeply, rolling my shoulders and willing the muscles in my neck to relax.
“I’m not sure you want me teaching you this lesson,” he says without looking me in the eye.
“You said Leanna should have already taught me—”
He falls into a fitful laugh before I can finish, and soon his eyes begin to water in the fashion of true humor. A laugh bubbles up within my chest to join him, though I have no idea what he finds so funny.
“Leanna should have, though I expect she would have a much different way of going about it.” He shrugs thoughtfully. “Though, for all I know she would go about it in exactly the same fashion.”
His eyes glint with thoughts unknown while they fully take me in.
“All right,” he says with a look of determination.
“All right?” I say, brows pitching low.
“I shouldn’t have to say this, but it needs to be said.” He unclasps the cloak I wear and pushes it off my shoulders. “It’s hard not to take some lessons to heart, and this is one you can’t afford to take personally. Understand?”
“Yes,” I answer easily.
In the years I have known him he’s taught me many harsh lessons and never have I taken any to heart. Resilience, for all my failings, is a skill I have in abundance. He pinches my chin between his thumb and finger, drawing my eyes to his.
“You don’t understand,” he says flatly. “But you must, so just don’t forget it.”
He stands, dropping his hold on the cloak and motions for me to stand with him. I don’t hesitate and as soon as I am on my feet, he wraps a hand around my waist, pulling me close. My breath hitches as my cheeks flush and I freeze under his gaze. I look up at him through thick lashes, and his jaw bounces at the end just before he spins us around with the abundant grace he’s always possessed so that the back of his legs are touching the cot.
“Say stop and the lesson ends, no judgment and no explanationsrequired. There is no expectation here.” His voice is so serious that I repeat what he said in my head trying and failing to make sense of it.
“All right.” I choke on the breathy whisper and I’m suddenly only aware of just how close he is.
My nipples pebble as the silk that binds them brushes against his tunic and I recall the hot summer day when we had last been this close. A day I have wished a hundred times to relive so that I might correct the error I made that split our paths and sent him so far from me.
His eyes don’t leave mine as his hands glide to my hips. He gathers the fabric of my dress until it is high enough to expose my core to a gentle breeze snaking in below the cabin door. My skin prickles with goosebumps and my breath shudders out in a whisper as I begin to tremble. My entire body tenses and my hands ball into fists at my sides. His eyes take in every minute reaction to his touch, studying the effect he has on me.
“Relax,” he says, “This won’t work if you don’t.”
CHAPTER 6
THE SOUTHERN KEEP, LA’TARI
Four Years Earlier
Ablissful breeze winds through the tall birches surrounding us, rustling their leaves and rushing over my body in a gentle caress, cooling the sweat beading on my neck. The shade cast by the ancient stand surrounding us offers a welcome reprieve from the harsh and enduring summer heat.
It has been a week since the shadow master first brought me to this hidden grove. One week since the keep all but stilled in the stifling heat. Bront had given up our morning training sessions and even hardened Leanna threw me into the keep library to study rather than exert herself in pursuit of my training. Where others remained blissful within the cool walls of the keep, I’d quickly grown restless. A dark cloud settled over me as my dreams began to leak into my waking life.
