“Whatcha doin’?” He asks with a smile, his eyes tracking down to the notebook in her lap.
“Just writing stuff,” she whispers before quickly closing it and tossing it into the bed. Thereis a shortbutvery heavysilence between them before she speaks up again. “I’m sorry I haven’t been answering your calls.”
He slowly takes a seat on the edge of her bed, using every ounce ofself-controlhe has notto reachfor her andpullher into his lap. Her skin looks warm and soft under the amber shade of her table lamp, and he can smell her vanilla scented shampoo from where he is sitting, causing him to imagine burying his faceinto her soft curls and whispering the I Love You that is sitting on the edge of his tongue.
“It’s alright. But I was worried about you, and I just needed to see you, Tess.”
She nodded sadly, avoiding eye contact with him for a second before taking a deep breath and reaching her hand out forhis.
“I’mnot mad anymore. Sorry I got so weird last night.”
“Tessa,” his voice is low and a mixture of sorrow and longing, “Youdon’tneed to apologize to me, okay?I’mthe one who needs to be sorry. I got too drunk and prioritized my friends over you and that was really shitty of me and...well...Abigail told me what happenedTessa...with Jake...”
Tessa’s face immediately flushes red and she dips her head low, holding her hands over her face in embarrassment.
“Hey, Tess, stop it,” he immediately moves towards her on the bed and grabs her tiny wrists in his hands, pulling her hands away from her face, only to see tears gathering in the corners of her eyes and his muscles suddenly feel like they’re on fire. “I’mgonnafucking kill him for this, I swear to God-”
“No!” Her head shoots up and she maintains a confident eye contact with him, “You can’t retaliate. You know he’s a jerk who would immediately report you and then you’d be off the team. And you’ve worked so hard this semester to get your grades up you can’t do something stupid like this to fuck it up.”
“Medo something stupid?” He asks with a chuckle. “That prick put his hands on my girl andI’mthe one who fucked up? You got it wrong baby –he'sthe one who fucked up.”
“Tristan. Promise me you won’t do anything.Promise me.”
“I can’t fucking do that, Tessa,” he responds with a casual shrug, as ifit'sasimple issue with no repercussions.
“I’m already so stressed about all of this,please don’t make me worried sick about you too,” she says desperately, moving her body even closer to his and placing her hands on bothsides of his neck. “I’msorry Ididn’ttell you but now that you know will you just focus on me, please? I really need you,” shewhispered,dropping herforeheadto his. “And if you want to help me and makemefeel better,you’llstay with me and not waste your time on him. Please? Would you just hold me and kiss me.”
She leaned in to kisshim,and he eagerly met her lips, desperately seeking out what he had been missing thewhole dayagonizing about what was going on with her and with them. He wrapped her up in his armsand leaned back against her headboard, letting out a long sigh as she laid back with him and wrapped her body tightly aroundhis. He slowly stroked her blonde curls with one hand and rubbed her back with hisfingertipswith the other, and she allowed her body to relax for the first time since all of this went down. She closed her eyes and breathed in hisscent andwiggled herself as closely as shepossibly couldagainst hisvery largeand very warm body that was unusually soft due to the layers ofsweatpantsand hoodie that he had on.
“I’m sorry you felt like you couldn’t tell me what happened,” he whispered into her hair.
“It’snot that Trist, I justdon’twant you to act out of anger or impulse and get in trouble.”
He stayed silent, continuing to rub her back and place small kisses on the top of her head.
“I just feel so safe when I’m with you,” she whispers into hisneck,and he feels goosebumps cover his whole body.
“Ishouldn’thave let you leave with him last night.I’mgonnabeat myself up about that for the rest of my fucking life.”
“Trist, don’t,” Tessa said flatly, “I was a stubborn asshole trying to make you feel bad. I practically forced you into having no choice.”
“Not true. I could’ve physically restrained you.”
Shecouldn’thelp but laugh at such a ridiculous idea. “I’m serious,” he said, getting some comfort out of hearing her giggle. “I should’vefiremancarried you back in that house and locked you inside.”
“Trist you were so drunk you would have dropped me on my head.”
“Bullshit. I’m an athlete, I can carry anything anywhere.”
She hummed in satisfaction, knowing it was true. Knowing how large and capable he was at anything physical. It made her body snuggle even deeper into his side.There were a few moments of comfortable silence between them before Tristan spoke up again.
“You know, I wasn’t planning on telling you this after suchsolemncircumstances but...” he said, causing Tessa to giggle at the use of a ‘big word’ as he called it, which he was quick to let people know that Tessa was the reason for his expanding vocabulary...there was silence again before Tristan cleared his throat and placed his finger underTessa’s chin, lifting it so she would look up into his eyes, “...but I love you, Tess.I’vereally fallen in love with you andI’mstill learning how to be mature about all of this.I’veneverloved a girl before. AndI’msorry Ihaven’tbeen showing a whole lot of emotional maturity, but you make me want to be better and do better. And I hope that none of this makes you put all those walls back up with me...I hope you can let me love you and take care of you, the way you deserve to be loved and cared for.”
Tessa’s heart felt like it had grown twiceit’ssize and was about to burstoutof her chest. Shecouldn’tbelieve the words she was hearing and thought this for sure was a dream. But when she felt his fingers gripping the back of herneck,she was reminded this was real and that the guy that she had fallenhead over heels for, despiteall ofher effortsnot to, felt the same way about her.
“I love you too,” she whispered through a lazy smile.
“Really?” He asked, unable to hide thegoofygrin that broke out across his handsome face.
