I’d done my best to slink back into the corner of the gallery, feeling like I was intruding on an intensely private moment, but they must have both remembered I was still there as they looked in my direction and started laughing.
‘Have a great evening,’ I said as I let them out. I glanced over at The Chocolate Pot, hoping that Tara would be near the door to spot her matchmaking working, but I couldn’t see anyone. I’d look forward to telling her later instead. I was so chuffed for Anastasia and hoped it could be the start of a romance for her asshe deserved it and, from the conversations I’d had with Colin last night at The Friendship Pod, he seemed like a good bloke.
But the person who wasn’t a good bloke was Declan. I’d told Aaron earlier that Ingrid returning to the family home didn’t necessarily mean they were back together. Surely she’d have explicitly said they were if that was the case. I wondered whether he might have let her back into his bed but not his heart – something she certainly wouldn’t have shared with Aaron. I wouldn’t put that past a man who’d happily coaxed his ex-girlfriend to Australia and conducted an affair behind her husband’s back for years. If that was the case, Ingrid had brought it on herself, but I wasn’t going to focus on that. She was the mother of my children and I’d once loved her very much. I didn’t want her to be used by Declan and left heartbroken. Nobody deserved that.
36
TARA
After Mum and Dad left on Wednesday night, I’d contacted Krystal who messaged me straight back to confirm that Leanne would meet them in the Judge and Quill. Today was the day. I was up earlier than usual, my head spinning with what might happen if Leanne genuinely had changed, was pregnant and wasn’t out to fleece our parents. What if they pulled out of the Whispering Winds purchase to move nearer to wherever Leanne called home? What if they slipped away from me? The thought of losing them again terrified me.
Butterflies fluttered in my stomach all morning and swooped as noon approached. After that, I was on edge, desperate for news. Shortly after three, they walked through the door and my eyes flicked beyond them, making sure Leanne wasn’t there.
‘Do you have time to join us for a drink?’ Dad asked.
Sue took their order and Molly started making the drinks as I led them to a quiet table at the back.
‘How was it?’ I askedthe moment we sat down.
‘Emotional,’ Mum said.
She was pale-faced and I could tell from the swelling round her eyes that she’d been crying.
‘Did she look pregnant?’
They both nodded and my heart sank. So it was true.
‘Did you tell her you wanted a scan?’
They exchanged looks and my heart sank even further. I’d been relying so heavily on Dad to remain the cynical one that I hadn’t even considered the possibility that they’d see her and both instantly welcome her back into the fold. Tears rushed to my eyes and I looked down at the table, pretending to pick up some granules of sugar that weren’t there and brush them to the floor while I composed myself.
‘So, what happens now?’ I asked, my voice and smile far too bright.
‘Tara,’ Dad said, his voice soft. ‘Please don’t be disappointed in us. It’s been a difficult day.’
The tears returned and I was too late to look away. I blinked them back but I couldn’t control the crack in my voice. ‘I can well imagine and I want to be happy for you because you deserve all the good things but I don’t think there’s anything good about Leanne. I know that’s harsh and I don’t mean to hurt you by saying it but what she did took two decades of my life away from me.’
Molly approached the table with a breezy, ‘Orange hot chocolate in your favourite yellow mug for you, Tara…’ and I turned my head so she couldn’t see my face as I forced out a bright, ‘Thanks, Molly.’
She set out the pot of tea for two for my parents and left. By that point, the tears had broken free. So much for never crying over that woman again.
‘We never wanted to upset you,’ Mum said, looking distraught.
‘You haven’t. You’ve done what any kind, caring parent would do and I love you for it. I hope she finally appreciates you and that, for your sake, this doesn’t turn out to be another of her games but I can’t…’ I took a shaky intake of breath. ‘I can’t believe I’m about to say this but I can’t be around while she claws her way back into your hearts.’
Mum pressed her fingers to her lips. ‘You don’t want to see us?’
‘I can’t. I’m not saying forever – that would kill me. I’m just saying for the immediate future – a bit of a break from seeing each other while you spend time with Leanne.’
‘But why?’ Dad asked. ‘We know you don’t want to see her and we respect that, but you said you wouldn’t ask us to choose and this does sound like a choice.’
He didn’t sound angry with me – just hurt and confused and I completely got it. How could they understand the strength of my feelings towards Leanne when they didn’t know the full story? Besides, even though it seemed she was telling the truth about being pregnant, I still didn’t trust her intentions. I was convinced she was scheming and preparing to do a number on our parents again and I didn’t want my contempt towards her to come between us. It was better for us all to take that step back.
Tears spilled down Mum’s cheeks. ‘We’ve only just got you back. I couldn’t bear not seeing you.’
My heart broke that I was upsetting her but, for the sake of my own mental health, I had to do this.
‘I feel the same but it’s for the best. And I promise I’m not making you choose. I’m the one making the decision. It took me fourteen and a half years to pick up the phone to you because it took me that long to put my life back together. For all that time, I blamed myself for what happened but I see now that it wasn’t my fault. I blame Leanne and Garth but mostly Leanne.’
