I believe you said, “I’m every woman,” with regard to our conversation about Vancouver.
I have clients all morning, but I’ll see you at 1pm with lunch.
Sarah Johnson
The front door chimes as I hit reply, informing me that Mrs. McDermont has arrived for her nine a.m. appointment.
Chapter twenty-four
I Wonder
Rubbingmysorearmwith a sigh, I exit the car with the burgers I'd picked up on the way to Alexander’s office, enter the glass building and board the elevator.
I took a few minutes to cry in the car because I'd had to inform Mrs. McDermont that I had to drop her as a client. I’d unfortunately become triggered when she'd wanted to talk about her feelings about her husband hitting her during sex, and I became so uncomfortable that I knew I couldn't keep her as a client. It was all too soon after Brandon had been hitting me.
So, I'll have to find a new therapist to take my place.
I take a second to look at my reflection in the elevator mirror and wince. My nose is slightly red, and my eyes are still watering, betraying my emotions.
I walk into Alexander’s suite, and my steps hesitate at seeing his receptionist has gone to lunch. A bit nervous, I shift on both feet, seeing his door slightly cracked and him busy typing at his desk. I pause for a second because his jaw is set tight as he focuses on whatever he's working on. He's got a no-nonsense look on his face, and it's kind of hard to believe this is the same man who'd just slept the night away in bed with me only mere hours ago.
Walking through the expansive space, I knock twice, waiting for him to call me in and keeping my eyes off the crack of the door. I hear him push away from his desk before walking to the door and opening it the rest of the way for me with a smile that quickly falls when he sees my face.
“Sarah, what’s wrong?” he says, making my eyes water even further.
Alexander’s brows furrow as he reaches out and takes the bag of food from my hand and ushers me in, closing the door behind me quickly. He pulls out a chair for me to sit in, his eyes glancing over my one-piece romper. I see his eyes linger on my hair that's pulled up into a loose, fat bun at the top of my head with tendrils that fall here and there, and his lips twitch like he's not able to help the smile that wants to grace his lips at the sight.
“I had to let a great client go. It was the first timeeverI’ve had to tell a client that I couldn’t see them. And I really liked helping her,” I reply thickly. My eyes fall to the desk as another tear escapes my eyes."I'm really upset about it."
Alexander pauses on his side of the desk as I bow my head and wipe the errant tear away. He grabs two tissues and holds them to me gently before lowering into his chair.
“I’m sorry to hear that." His elegant voice is awash with hesitancy that seems foreign to him. "Can you tell me why you had to let her go? You don’t have to give me any identifying information,” he assures, leaning back in his chair and getting comfortable.
Staring at him for a second, I entertain thoughts of physical touch from this man who seems socold.What on earth makes a person so detached and clinical?I wish he'd walk back around his desk and put his arm around me the way he’d done the night before; however, I have a feeling he won’t. It’d be too forward, and I don't think that being forward is in his personality.
His lip twists in annoyance, almost as if he'd had a displeasing thought, and I wonder what he's thinking.
I wonder if he desires human touch the way I do. His eyes flicker lazily over my face, and I hate that he sees me in my sadness when generally I'm such a happy-go-lucky type of person. Not anymore, I guess. He's broken me. Picking at a loose thread in the sleeve of my cardigan, I avert my gaze from the piercing azure of his stare and try to muster up the courage to reply.
“She triggered me during our session today," I start softly, keeping my voice low, "she’s a masochist, and she was wanting to talk about them…what theydo…in the bedroom." My eyes flick to his before averting immidiately. "He slaps her in the face and other stuff while they….you know.” I put the back of my hand to my cheek and blush hard.
I glance up in enough time to see a muscle in Alexander's jaw jumps in his cheek as if to try and hold back a grin. His brow rises cheekily as he swivels his chair slowly side to side. Something mischievous flickers in his piercing blue eyes before he smiles in earnest, although it looks tight like he's not able to help it.
Alexander's eyes flicker back to mine warmly. “Well… I’m sorry that someone’s sexual kink triggered you, but everyone’s got a kink. You know that, right?” he asks, reaching forward and fussing with the bag of food between us.
“Oh, yeah?” I scoff. “What’s yours?” I ask without thinking.
I slap my hand over my mouth, my eyes widen, horrified. Alexander pauses in his motions of unpacking our burgers, laughing at my distress. His blue eyes are full of humor as they meet mine.
“Booyyyy, you therapists just can’t help yourself, can you? No filterwhatsoever.” He chuckles. “Eatingis mine.” He smiles as if savoring a delicious secret.
Whoa.
My mouth falls open, because did this man just say his kink iseating pussy?I didn't expect him to be quite that bold.
I decide to deflect his comment. “Really? You don’t look like you eat a lot,” I say innocently as my eyes pin themselves to the two boxes in between us. But they fly back as Alexander surprises me with a deep, obviously sexual chuckle.
“I keep myself in shape so I can eatwhomeverI please.” He grins at me as I look away from him in surprise, but I can't help the smile on my face.
