Fuck it,I curse to myself, hurriedly reaching forward to grab her up by her arms before she can hit the floor, hauling her to me. I'm thankful for my fast reflexes.
She pants, and I look down at her, confused as tears fall out of her beautiful eyes, fast and unchecked.
“Bumpy!” Sarah cries, clutching the front of my shirt. “Bumpy. Bri-Brittany!” Goosebumps erupt across my skin as she leans her forehead heavily against my arm. She lets out a keening sound, her mouth opening in what can only be described as shock and horror. ”Nooooo!No!Oh, oh God, noplease,please don’t do this tom-me!”she sobs true, gut-wrenching,mournfulcries into my chest as I work to figure out what the fuck is going on.
My eyes go wide, flicking down her body in concern, and shock of my own, to be honest."Sarah—"
"The baby!"she wails.
I frown.Baby?
Sarah’s fingernails dig painfully into my arms as I work to clutch her tighter against me, feeling an uncomfortable trembling start from deep within my soul.
“Baby?” I ask, feeling my own face flush as I look down into her eyes.“What are you talking about, Sarah?”My voice sounds hollow even as the words leaves me with urgency.
A rough sound leaves my throat, and my heart beats strongly, forcing blood to rush in my ears. Causing my brain to work overtime as I struggle to piece it all together coherently.
“Losing it. Losing Bumpy,” she grits between her teeth as a pained whine escapes her mouth.
Tears continue falling down her cheeks, and my heart swells uncomfortably tight. I tighten my arm on her and reach over and snatch up my desk phone to dial the police when full blown awareness of the situation finally hits me. It's like a slap to the face.
Oh my God. She’s having a miscarriage in my office!
Sarah trembles before going limp in my arms.
I don't fight it. Something shifts deep in my spirit as I sink down to the ground with her, with the phone cradled tight between my ear and shoulder. My arms band tightly around her, arranging her with her back to me in between my spread legs. I keep her cradled close and rock her, forcing myself to keep my voice level as I give out instructions to my office to the dispatcher. My eyes remain tight on her while they assure me an ambulance is on its way.
Sarah's crying, curled over my thigh on her side, shivering and moaning in pain.
"I'm here. I'm here, and I got you," I murmur, pressing my lips to the top of her head.
I rub her shoulders, not able to offer her any reassurance about the situation with the baby. From the blood staining the back of her skirt, there's unfortunately none to give. My own blood runs cold when her cardigan slips, and I get an up close and personal look at the extent of the damage done to her back; small cuts and bruises mar her flesh.
She flinches when I brush my fingers lightly against one on her shoulder blade.
"No!" she cries out."D-Don't touch—"
"Okay. Okay, honey," I hurry to reassure her, immediately withdrawing my hand. "I won't. I just want to look, not touch. I need to see how bad it is and to see how hurt you are, honey, so I can tell them when they get here. So they know not to make it worse. Okay?" I keep my tone of voice low and calm, placing my palm directly on the side of her head and rubbing, trying with all my might to lend her my strength.
She rocks against me in a self-soothing motion, wailing her loss.
Swallowing hard, I know what I'm getting ready to witness is about to break what’s left of my fucking heart, but I grasp her cardigan between my fingers, and pull it away so I can get a better look. Her reaction is immediate; the wailing ceases, and she flinches, wrapping her arms around herself. Her slender fingers grasps mine tightly as she attempts to grab onto my hand to keep me from seeing. Scared.
"You don't need to be afraid of me,"I say quietly. My thumb brushes hers as I rock us gently, exercising patience. Her little whimpers are breaking my heart. "Shhh, you're okay, Sarah. It's alright. I just want to look. I'm safe, okay, honey? Let me look," I croon.
Small gasps leave her mouth as she pulls back slightly, finally letting me see the damage on her back.
"Thank you. You're sobrave,"I praise, squeezing her fingers and not letting her pull away just yet. "You're so brave to show me what's hurt you."
Letting her know that, even though she's trusting me to look, I'm willing to go slow. Make sure she feels safe.
But when I finally get her cardigan pulled away, my eyes go wide at the dozens of tiny cuts welted on top of huge blue andblack bruises. Squeezing my eyes shut tightly, I look away, biting my cheek hard as I begin to rock us both now.
You gotta be fucking kidding me. Oh sweetheart…
Anger rises up in me so hot that it's a struggle to keep my movements slow and gentle so as to not scare her.
I feel sick.
