But I didn't die.
I may have lost five years of my life and my baby boy's, but I'm far from dead. If anything, I'm determined.
From what Lia had told me and from what I'd seen online, it's clear that no one's missed me. Why, Chiara is right at home masquerading as me, and for all of Lia's protests to the contrary, Enzo sure seems cozy fucking his way through the entire city—even having the audacity to flaunt it publicly.
Besides Luca, he'd been the first person I wanted to see when I'd woken up. But the more I navigated the events of these last five years, the more disappointed I became. I saw countless photos of him with beautiful women, all in intimate settings, and sometimes even outside hotels. My heart had taken a big hit when I'd realized how quickly he'd discarded me.
If I'd been ready to look past his brutal nature, I could neverlook past his infidelities. So what if he hadn't directly contributed to me spending half a decade in a coma? He'd enabled the people who did, and that made it just as bad.
No, it made it worse. Because he'd had my heart—and he'd destroyed it.
Lia had tried to suggest he might have his reasons for doing that and that I should listen to him first. I'd declined. It's not as if it's the first time he's strayed.
In the beginning, I'd told myself to turn a blind eye; after all, we weren't on good terms and I couldn't expect him to be faithful to an unwanted wife. But as time passed and our bond deepened, so did my feelings and expectations. Every time I'd smellthatperfume on him had been like being stabbed in the heart, viciously and repeatedly.
It was only during my pregnancy that I thought he might finally be mine, and I'd been satisfied with whatever crumbs of affection he'd give me.
I'd just bottled everything up—the neglect, the cheating, the unrequited love—everything for the sake of harmony and the prospect of a family. I'd given everything in me, and he'd simply taken it.
Not anymore.
49
ALLEGRA
Leavingmy cane in a nook outside the fence of the house, I right my clothes, feeling uncomfortable in the glitzy dress. My face, too, is full of makeup in an attempt to emulate the photos I'd seen of Chiara online.
She certainly hadn't wasted any time making her entrance into society.
Tabloids upon tabloids had documented her crazy escapades as well as her disposable paramours, all of them somehow excusing the blatant fact that she's already married. Her sexcapades are so famous there are even sex tapes of her on porn sites—with my fucking face.
Why couldn't Enzo ask the doctors to give me a new face? At least then I wouldn't have to walk around knowing that Chiara's destroyed my entire life.
Holding my head high, I try to emulate Chiara's mannerisms—mostly her snobbery. I enter the house without making eye contact with anyone and without acknowledging the staff. After all, Chiara doesn't care about the people lower than her.
When I successfully get inside the house, I'm suddenly struck by the familiarity of it all.
Home… It had once been home.
Taking a deep breath, I refuse to let myself dwell in melancholy. I have one purpose.
But as I scour the house, I realize I have no idea where Luca's room is. It's only when I hear a small giggle that my heart seizes and I grasp onto that sound, following it until I reach the second floor. The door is half-open, and I stop right outside to peer into the room.
Luca, my beautiful boy, is on the floor trying to build something with Lego. There's someone else with him, his governess, probably, and she's helping him choose his pieces carefully.
I raise my hand to my mouth, muffling a sob as I watch my baby boy, so grown, so handsome. He looks like Enzo, and you can barely see a trace of me in him. With his raven hair and his green eyes, he's like a doll come to life.
Tears are gathering in the corners of my eyes, bottled emotions threatening to spill over.
A gasp escapes me, and Luca's governess notices me standing at the door.
"Signora," she starts, her tone none too pleasant.
"My husband is in the hospital. I came to sit with Luca for a bit," I lie through my teeth, hoping I'm a good enough actress to pull this off.
"Hospital? What happened?" She gets to her feet, her expression worried.
Not too young but not too old either, the governess isn't bad to look at. But her sudden concern is interesting.
