‘I see you’re taking Lord Black’s advice to heart.’ There’s a pause, and then Big Wang asks carefully, ‘How did Tony react to the vampires?’
Even though I know Tony and the others went upstairs, I still check the door is shut tight and lower my voice.
‘Honestly, I don’t know. He isn’t one to complain, though I’m sure it was really frightening. He’s mortal after all. I’ll have a chance to talk to him privately later.’ I perk up. ‘I learned something important: the Durand matriarch wasn’t always vampire. There is a way to make Tony immortal.’
‘Does Tony want that?’
My stomach sinks as I remember our argument. ‘He said he wants to stay mortal. That it’s part of him, like being vampire and hulijing is part of me.’
‘Tony is a very principled man, Jing. He likes order and predictability. It’s part of why hulijing unsettle him; they act on whim and desire. I can’t imagine he would look kindly on vampires after that beheading.’
‘He... he thinks it’s reassuring to know when he dies I’ll be there at the docks to greet him.’ A tear rolls down my cheek. ‘Big Wang, I can’t. I won’t. It’ll destroy me.’
Big Wang’s sigh echoes down the line. ‘It’s alright, Little Jing. You won’t have to.’ He uses the same gentle tone from my first days in yin Shanghai, when I was a scared little whelp. ‘I won’t let that happen. But you must promise to talk this through with Tony thoroughly, so you both understand what is at stake. Be honest, be patient, and trust him. The last thing he would ever do is hurt you.’
Sniffling quietly I nod, then remember he can’t see me. ‘I promise,’ I say. ‘Big Wang?’
A pause. ‘Mmmgh?’
‘Would you – would you help me search for my father?’
This time the answer is immediate. ‘Of course, Little Jing.’
Afterwards, Yue Gui shows me to my room where they’ve prepared robes and other necessities to freshen up while we wait for the Jade Emperor’s response. As I watch Yue Gui walk away, hips swinging to unheard music, Tony emerges from the door next to mine.
We ought to talk about the fight we had, about the hijacking and his vulnerability, about the fact vampirescanbe made, and that my newfound family can tell me how. But I’m physically tired and emotionally drained. I don’t want to fight. What I want is his skin on mine, my lips on his, to forget where he ends and I begin so there is no room between us for stress or worry.
‘Stay with me in my room?’
‘It wouldn’t be proper for us to share,’ Tony says. ‘What would Big Wang think?’
‘He won’t think anything if we don’t tell him.’ I waggle my eyebrows, trying to charm him into mischief even though I know this is a battle I can’t win.
Tony abhors lying and is an utter shit-stick about propriety. Without looking, I can guess the exact expression he’ll have smeared thick as lard across his face: horror at the thought of lying to Big Wang, indignation I would besmirch his integrity by even suggesting he could do so, and disappointment I would consider lying to get my way.
Still, I am very good at finding ways around rules. So I back slowly into my room, my eyes never leaving his. ‘Visiting isn’t against any rules, is it?’ I drag my gaze from his eyes down to his mouth and bite my bottom lip as want builds inside me.
His pupils blow wide. It’s all I need for a yes so I grab his collar and pull him into my room. Between one step and the next though, I’m no longer leadinghim, he’s leadingme.With one spin, he pins me against the door, his long, lean body flush against mine, making my breath hitch and my insides shiver. Long lashes sweep his cheeks as his gaze moves to my lips. He leans in, movements excruciatingly slow, waiting for me to say yes.
I wrap my hands around his neck, close the remaining distance.
Yes, I say with my lips.Yesyesyes.
Twenty-One
Breaching the General’s Defences
Kissing Tony always feels like falling into a pool of sunshine. Warm and safe, he cradles me gently in his arms. The ache of want is always there, but he’s careful to never let that want break the bounds of decorum, no matter how hard I might try.
His mouth moves against mine, soft and warm. His lips, his hands, are everywhere. At some point, his shirt ends up on the floor. My fingers trace the map of 7 over his body. With a growl, he crushes me to him and manoeuvres us away from the door, kissing and walking me backwards until we both tumble onto the bed.
This is usually where, bound by propriety, he draws that rotted line and abandons me to my hunger. But this time he doesn’t immediately untangle himself as he normally would. This time he doesn’t move away at all.
I push myself up and run my lips along his jaw, kiss the pulse at his throat.
Long fingers stroke my stomach, slowly parting my unbuttoned shirt.Did I do that or did he?The question fades on a gasp as his marauding hands reach the edge of my silk bra, clever fingers finding the two buttons keeping my straps in place. With a tug, he frees me of its constraints. Cool air pebbles my skin.
‘Tony,’ I breathe, a plea, a devotion, a promise.
