‘Yeah, yeah,’I say, waving his words away like he did mine.
Mr Lee pulls a frown worthy of Horsey and runs a hand through his hair. He catches my gaze. His eyes are no longer frightened. They’ve gone steely.Hells no. Turd-for-brains is going to apologise,again.
He stands, slaps his fist into his hand, and bows low. ‘You’re right, Lady Jing—’
‘Contain this worthless one’s outburst,’ I pitch my voice low and slow, mimicking Mr Lee’s courtly dog-fart. I wave his words away too. ‘May sherrr.’No problem, you rotted turd-egg.
Big Wang pats the air in a gesture meant to calm. ‘Where were we? Ah yes. You thought I was asking you to feed Little Jing your blood. That is unnecessary. She can drink from the dead.’
I remember the smell of the corpses in the river. The decaying stench –my stomach clenches and I gag. ‘Ew. No. Can’t Old Zao make me blood dumplings? You get the mortal papers delivered every day. Surely your couriers can bring dumplings back for me? I don’t want to drink from a rotting body.’ The thought makes me gag again. I point at Mr Lee. ‘If he has to come, he can put the blood in a nice clean glass.’
Big Wang laughs, actually laughs at me. I give him my meanest stink-eye, which just makes him laugh harder. I cross my arms, torn between disgust at having to feed off corpses and an almost painful yearning to see a real sunrise.
‘You are an adult. It is time you figure out how to feed yourself,’ Big Wang says, looking between me and Mr Lee who now wears a look of earnest endeavour which makes me feel even more nauseous. I hold a hand up to block his face from view. ‘Little Jing has blood twice a day, once with breakfast and then a second time as a midnight snack. She has lunch, dinner and a bowl of noodles or dumplings around 4 p.m. Be sure she is fed or you will have to contend with a cranky Little Jing, and no one wants that.’
‘Hey,’ I say, not liking this assessment of my character. ‘You’re cranky too when you’re hungry.’
Big Wang makes a sound that’s half grunt, half huff – not a denial but not an agreement either.
Since the dragon pearl seems to be somewhere safer than the Treasury, there isn’t a lot I can do to get back at Lady Soo, unless... I lean forward. ‘Do you think the hulijing are behind the fake talisman? The Hulijing Court mines yin silver after all. Maybe they wanted to sabotage your plans by getting rid of Mr Lee.’
Big Wang considers my words then nods slowly. ‘It is possible, though we have no evidence. It doesn’t matter though; Mr Lee brought the information I needed, and he will be here to consult on the project.’ He plucks a few peanuts from the bowl and pops them in his mouth.
I know the Hulijing Court makes the talismans and Brother Zhu picks them up for the Ministry of Thunder and brings them to the mortal realm. He’s rarely in Hell, but I’ve heard he’s often in yang Shanghai. Maybe I can talk to him, find out if the switch happened in the Hulijing Court, or after.
As if he can read my mind, Big Wang says, ‘If you want me to fix those roosters for you, then stay away from the hulijing, even in mortal Shanghai. They are bound by our laws to not bring dishonour on Tian, but I fear the chaos that may occur if you cross paths. You are not to draw attention to yourself. I don’t believe the two are connected, but even if they are, I want to keep you well away from Niang Niang’s machinations – which is the whole point of sending you to mortal Shanghai.’
I keep my expression placid, as if approaching the hulijing is the furthest thing from my mind.
Big Wang presses his lips together, then finally turns to Mr Lee. ‘In exchange for making sure Little Jing is safe in mortal Shanghai’ – Mr Lee raises an eyebrow at the wordsafe– ‘I will waive the requirement for you to work as an indentured servant after your death.’
I give them both a quizzical stare. ‘What kind of deal is this? I thought Mr Lee was here to help set up the Central Bank of Hell? Why would he need to be an indentured servant?’
Big Wang looks to Mr Lee, giving him the chance to speak. But Mr Lee doesn’t let his mahjong face slip. Turd-eggs. I cross my arms.Fine.
Big Wang takes something from his silwar pocket. ‘Wear this while you are in yang Shanghai.’ He hands me a curved white jade pendant on a red silk cord. ‘This belongs to the Jade Emperor himself. It has the Queen Mother of the West’s qi embedded in the jade. If you are wounded or hurt in any way, break the jade, release the qi. It will protect you.’
The carved jade phoenix is cool in my hand, the white crisp and luminous. Three bold strokes of colour swirl across the bottom – black, red, and green – each colour expertly carved into a sweeping tail feather. Big Wang does not give or ask for favours lightly; to borrow a personal item from the Jade Emperor for my sake is a huge deal.
I get to my feet and bow low. ‘By your fortune, this unworthy one offers an ocean of gratitude.’
Big Wang laughs, a hearty rolling thunder that fills the room. ‘Lord Ma will be so proud to hear of your proficiency in courtly piss-fart.’ He rises and pats my back. ‘You will stay at the mortal Cathay Hotel under the name Miss Wang. Willie Leung will meet you at the jetty. He represents my interests in mortal Shanghai and will arrange anything you need. If you’re ready, my guards will accompany you to the docks.’
‘Docks? Isn’t there another way into mortal Shanghai?’
Big Wang looks at me, clearly perplexed. ‘It’s the usual way – through the veil over the Whangpoo.’
Mr Lee stands suddenly. I narrow my eyes at him. If he gives away my weakness, I’ll have his brains for porridge.
He bows. ‘This worthless one is deathly afraid of water. Is there another way through?’
Wait— What?
Big Wang gives Mr Lee a funny look. ‘Normally yes, but it takes time to prepare. It is impossible at this short notice.’ Big Wang tilts his head to the side, scrutinising the mortal. ‘You made it through fine the first time.’
Mr Lee nods vigorously. ‘Yes, you are right. But I was inside a bag. That made it bearable.’
‘We could put you in a bag again.’
