My stomach lurched as the figures leaning against the simple chapel came into focus. It was a pretty building, set within a clearing surrounded by towering conifers. The sunlight split through the canopy, casting the sparse wooden buildings in a golden haze. Bird song and the mellow buzz of insects melded into a single melody. The small temple to Evella was obviously a well-loved part of this community, with bursts of late-flowering chrysanthemums and dahlias in neat borders. A growing number of chapels had fallen into disrepair as people stoppedbelieving. It would warm Enfys’s devout heart to see how well tended this place was. I should write her a letter.
My first letter as the queen of Asmar.
I scanned the area. The green trees swam as one. A verdant fortress with no chance of escape. I looked up as Asher approached. Each time I’d swapped from Matthias’s steed to his captain’s, Asher had walked by the horse’s side. He’d explained it was to ensure his steed wouldn’t tire with two riders, but I suspected he’d read the tautness in my shoulders, and provided me with the space I desperately needed.
Matthias tugged on the sleeve of his dark jacket, looking anywhere but at me. I’d always adored the way his soft waves tumbled into his eyes, and the high-necked suit, although wrinkled, fit him impeccably. His shoulders were so much broader than they had been. Pretending I wasn’t acutely aware of the smooth muscles he’d developed had been pure torture when he’d clutched my waist on his horse.
I halted a few steps away, for once grateful for the spots clouding my vision.
‘Sorry about your wolf,’ Asher said. ‘In all honesty, I’d prefer it if he was part of the wedding ceremony too. Imagine the stories you could tell if the priest shat himself silly during the ceremony.’
‘Yes,’ I said, looking over my shoulder to the whining, hazy lump. ‘Reverential excrement is what every bride wants on her wedding day.’
Matthias rubbed the back of his neck, pushing off the wall. ‘The priest wouldn’t marry us any other way. He’s worried Pablo might take off with some of their children if we left him outside, and he point blank refused to allow him in the chapel.’
I glared at Matthias who had the decency to look sheepish. Throwing my arms out, I indicated the bare village we stood in. The sparse residents too terrified of a wolf to walk the dustylanes. Only a handful of Matthias’s guards stood by. He’d told the rest to return to his palace.
Asher clapped his hands together. ‘At your wedding in Asmar, we could get Skye to make him a little suit. Do you think you could train him to carry a basket with the rings in? Or maybe…’
‘You think I’m going through all of this again?’ I snarled.
Matthias’s throat worked as he stepped forward. Shivers raced through me as clouds drifted across the sun.
‘Two weddings, one in each of our kingdoms, gives our marriage more integrity,’ he said. His hands reached out as though he’d hold mine, before letting them fall to his side. ‘The second wedding will be all yours to organise. Whatever you want, Sorrow. However, you want it.’
‘How magnanimous of you. And do I get to choose the groom next time?’
Pain flashed through his eyes. ‘One day, Sorrow.’ His mouth worked as though he wished to say more. ‘Let’s go in. Get married and then get your wolf.’ There was a tremble in his voice. I couldn’t work out if it was nerves or guilt. I couldn’t care less. If Evella had a shred of decency, she’d ensure the damned man choked on his vows.
‘If you’ll allow it’ – Asher held his muscled arm out for me – ‘it would be a great honour to accompany you to the altar. Matthias hasn’t stopped talking about you for the last five years, and although we’ve just met, I’m seriously warming to you.’
He flashed me another one of his wide smiles, and something settled within. I nodded as Matthias blew out a long breath.
‘I’ll see you in there.’
I tried to form an answer, but the words died in my throat. I merely dipped my chin. Accepting Asher’s arm, he placed his other hand over the top, guiding me towards the double doors.I swallowed, grateful for his kindness. My legs trembled so violently I’d have needed help even with my full sight.
‘There’s still time to run,’ Asher whispered as we stood in the whitewashed entrance. I turned and squinted behind me. A faint whine carried on the breeze. ‘It would break his heart after all he’s done, but I still think you should have some say in this. So, Sorrow, shall I pretend I’ve been bashed over the head and bested by a rather pretty, though incredibly fierce Drufaeran, or shall we go in?’ He raised a questioning brow.
I could barely think over the panicked drumming of my heart. Part of me wanted to take him up and run. Take the freedom I’d constantly been denied. But where would I even go? Hide in the woods? I had to face the truth. There was no home for me. There hadn’t been for eight years. Matthias’s offer, as much as it pained me, was my only path to remaining alive and out of Romero’s clutches. I closed my eyes, focused on calming my breaths. I may despise Matthias, and I certainly couldn’t trust him with my love, but he had a good heart – reckless certainly, but still kind, still good. And I’d be a queen. Perhaps this was an opportunity to prove to my stepfather, to everyone, I wasn’t merely a slow librarian, struggling to make out the words before me. Maybe this marriage could even give me a purpose…
And as Matthias said, it was only a means to an end. A way to escape the chains my stepfather had forged.
Blowing out a long breath, I raised my chin.
‘In. We go in.’
Asher chuckled. ‘Thank Evella. Matthias would skin me alive if you disappeared.’
The sky darkened to a deeper bruise. My quivering fingers gripped the thick wool of Asher’s dark blue jacket, and we entered the chapel.
I hadn’t attended many marriage ceremonies in my twenty-two years, but I’m certain they were generally longer than the five minutes Matthias and I spent before the sweaty, red-faced priest. He shuffled from one sandaled foot to the other, his long cream smock crinkling loudly every time he flinched. If memory served me right, he’d skipped over half the vows as his wide eyes repeatedly shot to the doorway, as though he expected Pablo to burst through and go on a bloody rampage. By Matthias’s amused expression, he held a similar opinion.
I’d been unable to meet Matthias’s gaze as I’d spoken my own vows. Tripping over declarations of love, devotion and fidelity had my mind spinning and cleaved open a hollow in my chest. Deep down, a part of me echoed those words, felt them acutely as I spoke them to the only person I’d ever truly craved. But a fierce rage smothered them as I recalled the days spent alone and injured in my bed. The endless years without any contact.
The priest didn’t smile until he finally uttered, ‘In the name of Evella, I declare you united. A solitary entwined soul. Let no man nor God tear apart those Evella has joined.’
At the mention of Evella’s name, I stared at her icon on the white wall behind the priest. Was she truly watching this charade? As I studied her golden eyes shining from a mahogany face, slender yet strong, young yet wise, I wondered if she’d intervened and thrown Matthias and I together. I snorted. If so, she had a twisted sense of humour.
