I sat on the sea wall and dangled my feet over the water below. The caves I had seen on the beach earlier were now halfway full with water. I could see why my parents never wanted me to play in them.
“Thinking hard?” asked a familiar voice from behind me, and I jumped. I looked back to see Llywelyn stood bundled up in a big coat. He had on lead a little grey dog that I couldn’t identify. “This is Dinky, and she’s a mutt,” he said as if sensing my thoughts.
“Dinky?” I tried not to make my laugh too obvious.
“I rescued her from an older lady who couldn’t look after her any more. It seemed cruel to change the name…can she come and say hello?” He looked down at Dinky, who was straining against her harness toward me. I nodded, and Llywelyn walked toward me. As soon as she could Dinky jumped up on to me and started to lick my face. I giggled and played with her ears.
“You’re a gorgeous little thing, aren’t you? Who gave you that silly name, huh? You should be called Boudica, or Caligula.Something that suits such a fierce little girl.” She lapped at my face again. I pushed her face away gently and she curled up on my lap. “She likes me…”
“Good judges of character, dogs,” Llywelyn said. I couldn’t tell if the statement was meant as a compliment or if he was just being matter-of-fact, as seemed to be normal around here. “Can I sit by here for a minute?”
I shifted to the side to let him sit down. Now, without anyone else around and without the awkwardness of the first time in the van, I could study his face properly as he looked out to sea. He was gorgeous. His beard was a little scruffy, sure, but it added a roughness to his face that was just nice. His eyes twinkled blue and his skin practically glowed under the moonlight. He turned to look directly at me, but I didn’t tear my eyes away.
“I saw you in the shop earlier. You looked like a kid in a sweet shop,” he said. I looked away in embarrassment so he continued. “No, it’s a good thing. Just didn’t have you down as the crafty type.”
“I’m not any more,” I said. “Nain taught me the basics when I was younger and used to buy me something new like that every Christmas - yarn, or a kids’ sewing machine. Then on my birthday she would buy me top ups and little supplies. It kept me creative. Then once I got to university it all sort of faded into the background. I haven’t started a scarf in about ten years. Could use one now, though.” I pulled at my jumper, shivering.
“Do you want my coat?” Llywelyn asked, already taking it off.
“No, don’t be stupid. You’ll be cold then.”
“It’s big, we can share if you scoot close enough.” Llywelyn said it without thought as if it was the most normal thing in the world. He inched closer in when I didn’t and swung one half of the coat over my shoulder, leaning even further in for warmth.
His one hand rested almost on mine on the harbour wall. Dinky cuddled between us for the warmth, and everythingseemed to slow down. Was he interested, in some way? Surely not. I’d grown up in London, a hub for the gay community. Small towns like this didn’thavegay people. Except…
“So, Gwyn and his husband run the craft shop? And people around here are fine with that?” I asked, trying to keep my tone as casual as possible.
“Oh yeah, this place is very welcoming.” Llywelyn looked down at his hands. “There’s actually a bit of a joke about there being something in the water. The village has been pretty progressive since Mr Prentis and his partner started seeing each other back in the 60s. See, there are quite a few gay men in the village. The headmaster of the school is, some people say the local baker is screwing the local mechanic, my best friend Tudor is gay…and so am I.”
The words I’d been waiting to hear. And I didn’t know why, because I certainly wasn’t going to do anything about it. “Me too,” I said as casually as I could.
“I know. Your Nain and her best friend have already probably told half the village that much,” he said. “Think they were hoping to set you up with a good Hiraeth man.”
“Fat chance,” I chuckled. “I’m a city boy.”
“You fit in pretty nicely in the country too,” Llywelyn said quietly. I pretended I hadn’t heard anything. No point fantasising about having lovely country babies with lovely country men. That wasn’t my dream, anyway.
“Right,” Llywelyn said once the silence had stretched into something awkward. “Let’s go Dinky. Don’t want to be out too late. Do you want me to walk you home, James?”
“Nah, I’m all good for a bit. Just want to look out to sea.” I shivered as Llywelyn stood up. He noticed and draped the coat back over my shoulders.
“You need it more than me,” he said as he brushed off his jeans. Dinky jumped off my lap and stood by him.
“When will I give it back?” I asked.
“It’s a little village, you’ll run into me.”
“Well…thanks for the chat tonight,” I said. “It’s nice getting to know people here. Even if I won’t be around for long.”
“Any time.” Llywelyn smiled, then tugged at Dinky’s lead as he turned to walk away. I looked back out to sea and at the moon’s bright reflection on rippling waves. The boats bobbed in the wind. It was a beautiful night.
4
Chapter Four
Llywelyn
When I woke up, the first thing that came into my mind washim. James. The way he looked under the moonlight, how sad and lost he had looked. How nice it was to help keep him warm and to make him smile. How I wanted to do it again. Thinking of him also led to another problem this early in the morning, and I could see it tenting the duvet. When I moved my hand downwards to do something about it I accidentally disturbed the covers, letting a draft of cold air in and killing the mood completely.
