Ben came to the doorway, his face miserable. “How you doing?”
Tommy looked up at him and raised his eyebrows. “How’d you think I’m doin’?”
Caroline turned to gaze at Ben. “Okay, what’s going on here?”
After Tommy fired him a warning glare, Ben said quickly, “Tommy’s not feeling so good.”
“Well, that much I can see for myself.” She stroked Tommy’s back once again. “Can I get you anything, sugar?”
Tommy bit back the sob that was right there behind his lips to hear the kindness in Caroline’s voice. “Just…. Just give me a minute, please.” He leaned over the toilet bowl, his stomach tense, but there was nothing else in there. He caught Ben’s whispered, “Come on, Mom,” as he led her out of the bathroom. Tommy flushed and then sat with his back against the tub, his insides a swirling mass of tension.
Mike is a porn star. There was no getting away from it. The proof had been right there on the screen, not just once, but twice. Then it hit him, the difference in ages. Mike had obviously been doing this for a long time. Mike… having sex with guys on camera…lotsof guys.
The thought was as physical as a blow to the solar plexus.
Tommy drew his knees up toward his chest and hugged them, his forehead pressed against them. He felt hollow, as fragile as the crystal that adorned the shelves of Caroline’s china cabinet. One more shock and he’d shatter, splintered into thousands of tiny sparkling shards. In his head he kept seeing Mike on that screen, the expression on his face as he….
Tommy wanted to scream, as if that would force the images from his mind.
“Mom’s gone back upstairs.” Ben came into the bathroom and hunkered down next to Tommy. “I didn’t say a word.” He lightly stroked Tommy’s arm. “How about we get you up offthe bathroom floor and onto the couch? It’s a damn sight more comfortable, for one thing.”
Ben tried to help Tommy to his feet, but Tommy shrugged off his hand. “I can manage by myself.” Pain pulsed through his temples as he stood up. One look at Ben’s stricken expression was enough to set his stomach fluttering. He knew it wasn’t Ben’s fault. The resentment that filled him was nothing to do with Ben and everything to do with Mike having lied to him.
But did he?Lie to me? Or did he just keep his mouth shut?
Whichever way Tommy looked at it, Mike had chosen to keep silent about something that was huge.
Tommy walked into the living room, Ben hovering at his back. He went into the little kitchen area and poured himself a glass of water and drank the whole thing in a few gulps. All of a sudden he felt bone tired.
“Am I gonna be in your way if I lie down on the couch?” he asked Ben. “I just wanna close my eyes for a while.”And maybe sleep will help turn off my brain, ’cause right now, I can’t take much more of this.
Ben nodded. “Sure. I’ll go upstairs and get out of your way.” He hesitated, then pushed on. “I’m sorry, okay? I just didn’t think?—”
“No, you did not,” Tommy said heavily. “But give me a while, an’ I’ll be fine.” He locked gazes with Ben. “I know you felt you had to tell me, fair enough, but right now I’m havin’ a hard time gettin’ my head ’round that.”
“I can understand that,” Ben said quickly. “You take all the time you need.” He stepped away from Tommy and headed for the stairs.
Tommy flopped onto the couch and put his arm across his eyes. It was no good. Mike was still there, still balls-deep in some other guy’s ass, still whispering in his ear while he….
Hot tears pricked his eyelids and spilled out in a torrent that couldn’t be held back another second. He turned his head to the back of the couch and sobbed into the seat cushions, letting it pour out of him. He cried his heart out until the back of his throat felt raw and his stomach muscles ached. When it had passed and he lay there, limp and exhausted, he curled up, arms tucked under his knees.
What do I do now?
Whatcouldhe do? He was in love with a guy who he’d just discovered made his living from having sex with guys for thousands of other people to watch. And that was just the tip of the iceberg. There were the feelings of betrayal that twisted Tommy’s guts into an ugly mess. Because Mike had just taken something that wastheirsand stomped all over it.
Okay, this was getting weird.
Tommy not answering his phone the previous night was kind of understandable. It was already past 1:30 a.m. when Mike had called. He figured Tommy had fallen asleep, and left him a message for when he woke up—a sexy message, seeing as there was no school for him and they were going to discuss plans for their little getaway. So when he woke up and reached for his phone to read Tommy’s reply, he got….
Nothing. Not a word.
Mike sent another text. And another. And another.
When it got to midday and five texts had gone unanswered, the panic set in.
Something was really wrong. And Mike wasn’t about to sit in his house when Tommy was only a few blocks away. He neededto make sure Tommy was okay, because this wasn’t like him. He grabbed his jacket and his keys and hurried to his truck.
Tommy’s truck was parked in the driveway when he got to the house. Mike went up to the front door and rang the bell. Bethany opened the door and smiled when she saw him.
