Everything just… stopped.
“What d’you mean?” Tommy stood at the end of the couch, hands by his sides, curling into fists.
Ben frowned. “What doyoumean, what do I mean? Now’s the time to find yourself another guy.” He waggled his eyebrows. “You need to get out there an’ sample what’s available.”
“But why would I do that?” Tommy persisted. “I’m with Mike.”
Ben stilled. “You’re not ‘withMike,’” he said, hooking his fingers in the air. “Don’t make it out to be more than it was, okay? It was just sex.”
Icy fingers picked their way down Tommy’s spine. “An’ what if I want to be with Mike?” he said softly.
The look of genuine puzzlement on Ben’s face made his heart sink.
“Why would you wanna do that?” Then he peered intently at Tommy. “An’ never mind whatyouwant—what does Mike want?”
Tommy couldn’t continue the conversation. “I’m just about done here. I’m gonna go find Bethany an’ say good-bye to her an’ your folks.” Anything rather than try to figure Ben out.
“Fine,” Ben said with a wave of his hand. “I’ll get my stuff together.”
“You do that.” Tommy left the living room and went up the stairs into the main house, heading straight for the kitchen. He found Bethany alone in the kitchen, making herself a sandwich, headphones on and be-bopping away to whatever music was playing on her iPhone. He stopped for a second and watched her from the doorway. For all her mature remarks and insights, sometimes he forgot that she was only seventeen.
Bethany whirled around, arms outstretched, and came to an abrupt halt when she caught sight of Tommy. An involuntary “Eek” escaped her, and she turned off the music. “Warn a person, why don’tcha?” She blushed.
“Sorry, Bethany.” Tommy came fully into the kitchen. “There any coffee left?”
Bethany shook her head. “I was about to make some tea. Want some?”
He nodded, and she filled the kettle and set it on the stove to boil. Tommy sat at the table, his mind still reeling from his talk with Ben.
“You want half my sandwich?”
He looked up. “Nah, I’m good.”
Bethany stood with the counter to her back and leaned, tilting her head to one side. “You okay, Tommy?”
He opened his mouth to tell her he was fine, but that wasn’t what came out. “I just don’t get your brother,” he blurted out.
Bethany gave him a sympathetic look. “What’s he done now?”
Tommy hesitated, and Bethany held up her hands.
“You know what? If you don’t wanna tell me, that’s fine. But I do know what he’s like.”
Tommy made up his mind and relayed their conversation. Bethany listened, her hands busy making the tea. When he’d finished, she brought over the two mugs and sat down next to him. Bethany regarded him with a speculative glance.
“Tommy, Ben is a slut. Surely you must know that by now?” He stared at her, mouth open, and she laughed. “Go on, then, tell me I’m wrong.”
Tommy said nothing, although there was plenty hecouldsay. He knew there were nights during the week when Ben didn’t come home. He knew where Ben spent his Saturday nights. He was just too polite to say so.
“Tommy, just ignore him, okay? Let him live his life the way he wants to. You don’t have to do likewise.” She studied him intently. “If you want to be with Mike, then you go get him, y’hear?”
He smiled, the tightness in his chest easing. “Thanks, Beth.” Her support meant a lot. Tommy found it difficult to put into words what he was feeling. Ben’s words had disquieted him, making him doubt himself. That last question about what Mike wanted still rang in his ears. And if his classmates knew what he was thinking in that moment, doubtless they’d laugh at him.
Is it so wrong to think that last night meant something?That it was important?
Tommy couldn’t help it. His upbringing, his parents’ teachings, all of it led him to one conclusion: he and Mike had shared something that you didn’t just walk away from. He had no way of knowing if Mike wanted this to go any further, but Tommy wanted to see where it led next.
It was the least he owed Mike.
