“After we cleaned it away, I stood in the ashes and knew I couldn’t just walk away. Parts of you are buried here, tiny pieces of your heart and soul. I’m a selfish man, Citi. I want all those pieces too. So I bought the land and the land around it, one hundred acres to be precise, and watched your babies bloom,” he whispers, sweeping his arm out to the wildflowers to the left, untouched from hurt and harm. Only now there is a stone bench in the center.
I pull away from Ambros and walk over to the bench, my fingers trailing over the flowers that have grown so much since I’ve been gone. “Hello, my darling boys.”
I take a seat on the bench and breathe in the sweet smell of flowers that cast a soothing calm over the evil that once blanketed this place. I watch Ambros as he approaches me slowly before taking a seat beside me.
“Why one hundred acres?” I whisper.
“You built a garden for your babies. I want to build a legacy for mine. One filled with love, and kindness, patience, and forgiveness for you, for them, and for all the babies that were taken far too soon.”
“What?” I look at him, confused.
He turns toward me and takes my hands in his. “King helped me get it set up. He handled all the legal jargon. Forget-Me-Not Sanctuary is now a final resting place for all children taken too soon. It’s a place where parents, family, and friends can come and visit them, tell them stories, and hold birthday parties if they want. They can plant trees in their memory and watch them grow tall and strong over the years so that they’ll never be forgotten.”
I cover my mouth to hold back my sob. I take the place in and realize, as hard as it is to be here, this is the most beautiful, wonderful thing he’s done. Not just for me, but for all parents going through hell.
“Did I get this wrong?” His voice comes out rough and full of regret.
I shake my head and scoot closer, pressing my head to his chest. “It’s perfect.”
We sit like that for a few minutes, just me, Ambros, and my boys, before I pull back and look up at him.
He swipes my tears with his thumbs. “Tell me about them.”
I swallow hard before opening my mouth and letting it all spill out. “Thomas was my first. I was twelve.”
He tenses but doesn’t interrupt me. “He had my hair and a dimple in the center of his chin. I never got to see his eyes before Jasper took him from me. I didn’t know what he planned to do until it was too late. He came back inside later without him, and I just knew. He said the demon was in him, but I knew the only demon here was him.”
I grip the front of his cut, needing his strength now more than ever. “Jasper threw him in the trash. My beautiful baby boy—thrown away like he was nothing. But he wasn’t nothing, Ambros. He was everything to me. I waited until Jasper fell asleep and crept outside. I thought the sound of the shackle would wake him. It was so freaking long, I was forever tripping on it, but luck was on my side.”
I take a deep breath and battle the all-consuming pain that comes with the memories. “I pulled Thomas from the trash, wrapped him in a blanket, and spent the next hour rocking him, telling him how much I loved him and how sorry I was. I buried him in his blanket just before the sun came up. And then I went back to lie beside a monster.
“Elliot came two years later. Benjamin a year after that. Three years later, I gave birth to twin boys, Jonah and Miles. I buried all my boys next to each other so they would never be alone. And over the years, flowers started to bloom randomly. When two years passed with no more babies, I felt relieved. Icouldn’t bear to lose anymore. And then my period stopped, and my stomach started to swell.”
I look out at the flowers. “Look how beautiful they are, Ambros.”
He leans his head against mine as we watch the flowers dance in the breeze.
“I think we should bring Capone here.”
He pulls back to look at me. “Really?”
I nod and smile softly, thinking of all the children’s spirits that’ll dance among the flowers. “I can’t think of a better protector than him.”
“I agree.”
“Can you call them? Havoc and the others. See if they come.”
“Of course. I’ll be right back.”
He stands up and walks away as I lean back and let the sun warm my face. A peace settles over me as I start talking, telling my boys all the things I never got to say before.
Ambros sits beside me, his hand wrapped around mine, absorbing each word as if they were a precious commodity. Because to him, they are.
I turn to him when my voice starts to feel hoarse. “If not now, someday?”
“Someday.” He nods, ever patient with me.
I reach up and cup his jaw. “Right here, right now. This is my someday, and you, sir, are my forever. I love you so damn much.” I kiss him before he can speak, pouring all my love into it.
