“You’re not broken, remember?”
Lux drew a long breath.I remember.
She opened her mouth and allowed the drops to coat her tongue.
Lux closed her eyes at once, scrunching them tight. Something clattered to the ground, then Shaw’s hand gingerly cradled her bruised and swollen cheek. “Just breathe. You won’t be sick. It worked. It has to.”
And Lux whispered those same words to herself until her stomach settled. Her breaths too. Until—
“Saints above,” she breathed.
“What? Did it reverse?”
Her initial answer was to bury her nose in his chest. To inhale his scent and his warmth and all it brought within her. But eventually, she said, “I used to be scared of my feelings for you becoming irreversible. But I was never more scared when they weren’t.”
His temple lowered to press against hers. “We’ve been irreversible from the start, Lux. I knew I was the one to realize it first.” She huffed and he kissed her. “Will you keep it? Mothlock, I mean.”
“Never. I feel like I see nightmares in every corner.” She pulled back, enough to look out the window. “But I might keep one part.”
“Dangerous?HowcanIbe dangerous?”
Cecily wrung her hands in Mothlock’s kitchen while sitting beside Aline. Aline, who glanced at her discreetly while taking apart the weapon she’d created. Lux hadn’t used its last shot, and the girl had deemed it too dangerous to keep together.
“Corvin enjoyed manipulating,” Lux explained. “I think he wanted your brilliance so he might control others’ feelings. My guess is Kent was worried Corvin would realize his spitefulness and secret wish to usurp him. You’re not actually dangerous. But you were dangerous to him.”
“Well,Ithink,” said Aline, “that some people don’t wantto feel others’ emotions. It’s harder to destroy people’s lives when you understand the pain.”
Lux’s gaze dropped. She’d hidden from others’ emotions for a long time. Even her own.
Not anymore,soothed her heart, and she accepted the comfort.
She’d unburied it all, well and truly and good this time.
“I would never use my brilliance to manipulate people.” Cecily shook her head, a determined set to her mouth.
Lux leaned back, her tea in hand and eyes drifting to the curved stairwell that had once held a nightmare. That first time she’d ever seen it. She said, “That’s why, no matter what they did, you would have always possessed more power than them. They were sinking and rotting, being eaten by their brokenness, and they knew it. It’s pathetic, really, how hard they clung to something nature said was never meant to be.”
“Nature sure said it loud enough at the end,” said Cecily, giggling at her own conclusion.
Aline blinked at her with wide eyes, then snorted, trying to keep a laugh at bay. Lux did too, biting her cheek. But both proved useless. As Aline dropped her head, giggling as high and light as Cecily, and Lux pressed her fingers to her eyes, huffing breaths of laughter through her nose, Lux thought, there was no better way to see justice realized than by all the things the Society of Saints had tortured and overlooked.
“Mothlock is a mess,” said Lux, her humor slowly fading. “I don’t know where to start.”
“I think all of Verity would happily clean it up. They hate what became of this place.”
“Just ask people for help, Lux,” said Aline, rolling her eyes. “It’s what I did.”
Lux scoffed. “I don’t know what you’re implying. I’ve asked for help from you before.”
Aline’s expression soured. “Don’t remind me. I still haven’t forgiven either of you for almost dying.” She pushed her teacup away. “But other than that one time, have you ever?”
“She’s ashamed,” said Cecily, then she squeaked at Lux’s sharp glare, covering her mouth. “I’m sorry! I’m trying to be better about blurting others’ feelings.”
Lux’s glare remained. “I’ve asked Shaw for help. I’ve asked you, Aline. And I agreed for Viktar to take those two carriage drivers to his lumber mill, didn’t I? Just because I take care of myself and don’t want to endanger anyone else, doesn’t mean I’mashamed.” She scowled harder at Cecily.
“But you are,” said Cecily. “And I think you should stop. Unless you like it. Being alone.” Her expression made it known she knew Lux didn’t, in fact, like it.
“Not all the time. No,” Lux grumbled.
