I looked up at my sister, seeing the concern in her eyes. "I don't know yet. But I will."
After Rhea left, I sat watching the stars emerge one by one, thinking about Elin. About trust and betrayal. About love and what it meant to forgive.
Hours later, I finally stood, my decision made. For better or worse, I knew what I had to do.
Chapter 31
I’dbeenworkingfromhome for the last week—only doing video sessions with the clients I couldn’t push off. Rhea had texted me late that night to let me know Gavriel was safe and that they’d talked, and then she’d asked me to give him some time.
Patience.
I’d never been good at that.
My phone sounded with the Lounge’s alert. I’d called and asked them to reschedule everyone for the next two weeks. I was lucky that my clients had been understanding that I’d had an emergency I had to deal with. There was no way I was going to be able to take care of them while my mind was so distracted.
Rhea had told me there had been another problem with a shipment, but luckily nothing had been compromised, and Gavriel and Harley had handled it. His father hadn’t killed him, and Rhea had said he had taken some of his anger out in more “constructive ways” on their father’s orders. I tried not to think too far into that.
Over the last few days, in an effort to keep myself sane, every corner of my townhome had been scrubbed. The living room was spotless, the kitchen was so clean, you could eat off any surface and not flinch, and the bathrooms had been bleached, scrubbed, and even I couldn’t believe how clean the grout was on the tile floor.
I was exhausted. Every time I’d just about fall sleep, my mind would start racing and think of the look on Gavriel’s face when I’d confirmed that I had been feeding the FBI bits of information. I still didn’t understand why he hadn’t pulled his gun and shot me immediately.
Because he loves you.
Rhea’s words kept flowing through my head. The kicker? I wanted to believe her.
A soft knock sounded at my door, and I shifted my laptop to the cushion next to me before getting up and answering it. Rhea had stopped by a few times to make sure I was okay, and I expected she was probably checking in again.
When I slowly cracked the door open, my breath caught in my throat. Gavriel stood there, his eyes burning into mine with an intensity that made my skin prickle. His jaw was clenched tight, a muscle twitching beneath the stubble that had grown thicker since I'd last seen him. The silence between us crackled.
Gavriel tried to sound strong, but I heard the weariness in his voice. “Can we talk?”
Nodding, I stepped back and let him come in. “I didn’t hear the bike.”
“Brought the car,” he mumbled as he sat down in my comfy, dark brown leather chair. I settled back on the couch as he leaned forward and took a deep breath. His voice broke as he asked, “Why?”
“What?”
“Harley and Rhea have been telling me all week, but I need to hear it from you. Why did you do it?”
I huffed out a strained laugh, surprised he was even asking. “You killed my father, Gavriel! He was your best friend, Rhea’s soulmate. And you killed him, all on your father’s orders.”
He turned his head to the side, and I could see him thinking. Could practically hear the gears grinding in his head. “I-I thought we were becoming something more than our dynamic. How could you betray me like this?”
Swallowing hard, I stood, took a step toward him. “Look at me.” When he did, I continued, “We have been becoming something more. It’s why I stopped. Even gave him false information a couple of times to keepyousafe. When there was safety and trust between us beyond the dynamic, I couldn’t do it anymore. The day before you found out, he asked what I knew about the arms shipment, and I reiterated I wasn’t helping him anymore. He found out without me. Anything in the last few months hasn’t been with my assistance.”
As he stood, I saw the mistrust in his eyes, and I had earned that. I needed to live up to my responsibilities of being his domme, if he still wanted that.
“Columbia?”
“I didn’t know anything about it.” My heart was thumping hard in my chest.
“You promise me that you haven’t—”
“Gavriel, my pretty, Pretty Boy.” My voice was soft as I reached out and cupped his face and waited. When he leaned into it, closing his eyes, I released a long breath. “There is something between us. I don’t know what it is anymore . . . or if I’ve ruined it. At first, everything I did was to get into your good graces to destroy your family. Then there was that night you put me to bed in the office and stayed with me. Something monumental changed between us then. I couldn’t hate you anymore. I stillloathe that you killed Dad, but what relationship doesn’t have its problems?”
“Relationship? Is that what we have? Outside of the dynamic?”
I swallowed, and my heartbeat was a hard beat in my ears. “Do you want that? Do you want us to belong to each other outside of the dynamic?”
