“Full of shame,” I said, tensing when the pants went down. But she never took her eyes off mine. “They feel shame.”
Ivy blinked hard, a breath falling from her lips. “I don’t need them ashamed, Ry. I need my mates at my side.”
She sounded so tired, like she’d already come to terms with their distance, so the last thing I wanted to do was make it any worse. And it wasn’t like I owed either of the mages anything; they’d made their dislike of me well known. I respected them as her mates, but that respect was waning based on her admission.
Being parted, even though we’d had our dreamscape, made me never want to be away from her again. Only real death would do that now.
If I were them, I would never have left her after her escape. But that didn’t appear to be the case.
“Come in with me,” I murmured, lowering my face to hers. Ivy sucked in a breath, going still. “Be with me.”
I felt her shudder against me as her eyes closed. “What you need is a bath, and then rest,” she said, trying to sound firm—but failing. “No funnybusiness.”
“What I need is my mate,” I replied seriously. “Every moment I am with you, I feel stronger.”
Ivy opened her eyes, looking unimpressed as she cocked her head. “Fine. I’ll go in,” she muttered. “But I’m not getting my hair wet.”
I chuckled. A light, almost weightless feeling bloomed within me. For the first time since leaving her in the woods as teens, I felt…alive. Real.Right. My death had been a sort of rebirth, because I even felt different. Not the same hard, coldness from years of dealing with my father’s abuse.
While my body had been healing, my heart and mind had, too. The dreams with her had stitched together the pieces of me broken when I’d left, the parts of me that’d been destroyed by Hyperion and his enforcers. Ivy might never realise just how powerful our dreams together had been—especially to me—because I finally felt like I could be more for her.
I couldn’t stop myself from watching as she shed her t-shirt, carefully folding it and putting it on the vanity behind me. She wore no bra, allowing her breasts to sway as she moved to her sweatpants. To the naked eye, she didn’t even really look pregnant. But I’d spent enough time observing her to recognise the subtle changes happening in her body.
Her breasts were fuller, nipples darker. Her stomach mostly looked the same, except it appeared firmer around her upper abdomen.
The biggest difference was the collar. It sat darkly around her neck, a choker of power. It made me physically ill; every dream we’d had, she’d never had it on. But now, it was a real reminder of the dark hold Dante had on her.
When she was completely naked, Ivy pulled her hair into a messy bun before moving to my side. “Alright, we need to be careful getting in.”
“Like I said, I am getting stronger.” Though I wouldn’t push away the help, especially from her. Just the way the side of her body felt against mine had me feeling an entirely different way. And it had a part of me standing to attention.
At least she didn’t comment on it, though when we tookour first step into the bath, I hissed at the warmth of the water, and how sensitive my skin was.
“You okay?” she asked quietly.
I nodded once, gritting my teeth. “Yes,” I said, toes curling in the water. “I’ll be fine.”
I kept my reactions to myself as she helped me all the way in. I wanted to hide it from her, didn’t want her to see any sort of weakness, but with Ivy there really was no point in hiding. Not as she helped me onto the sunken bench beneath the water, forcing me to meet her concerned gaze.
“Don’t lie,” she said, cupping my cheeks. “I can tell—even without our bond—you aren’t fine.”
I sighed. “I don’t like appearing weak,” I admitted, leaning into her touch. “I’m supposed to be taking care of you, my flower.”
Her eyes softened. “That’s the thing about being mates,” she murmured. “We take care of each other.” Slowly, she leaned in, brushing her nose against mine. “You’ve always taken care of me, Orion. Now, it’s time for me to take care of you.”
I didn’t want to argue, but she would never know the amount of care she’d given me. Never understand how much I owed her. Not just because of the cabin and everything she did then, from helping me with my wounds to keeping me warm and fed. It was everything that came after, too. From the bond, to giving me a reason to live—to fight. If it weren’t for her, I would have lost to Hyperion years ago. I would have let him beat me down and never gotten back up again.
Without her, I had no reason to live.
She was everything I had. Everything I needed.
As she went through the steps of washing my hair, I couldn’t help but admire her; from the gentle circles she rubbed against my scalp as she washed away weeks of oil and grime, to the quiet way she ran the washcloth over my sore skin, always soft, moving slowly through the motions.
And I couldn’t take my eyes off her. Not away from the pink flush highlighting her cheeks, or the littlesmile on her lips. Nothing in her eyes told me she was at all uncomfortable with this, or that it irritated her.
“You know,” I said, breaking the silence, “regardless of whether you’re ready or not, you will make a wonderful, kind mother.”
Ivy’s eyes shot to mine and widened. “You think so?” she asked hesitantly, setting the washcloth aside.
