I lost my only brother and never had any hope that anyone could ever take his place.But I like the thought that maybe Angelo can.
“I’ll start making the arrangements and tell the men you need their help,” he says.“But they will want to hear your story before they decide to follow you.Tomorrow night?”
I nod.“I’ll be here.”
“Good.Now, go back to the hospital.And keep me posted.”
I promise him I will and practically fly out of the study.I wish I could tell Goldie the good news tonight.But that will have to wait.Because if there’s one lesson that I well and truly learned in my life is that you don’t count your chickens until they’ve hatched.
Chapter46
GIANNA
We arrived backat the hospital just after midnight.The nurses tried to stop us from entering, but I just walked right past them and let Matteo take the brunt of it.There wasn’t much of that to take, since they gave up pretty quickly.
I don’t know what’s gotten into me.I used to be so obedient, always wanting to do the right thing, to do what was expected of me, what was proper.Now I don’t care about the rules anymore.Any of them.
Chiara’s condition was unchanged when we arrived.Neither better nor worse.She’s asleep and they only let me see her for about five minutes before the nurse ushered me back out, muttering that it’d be better if I went home and came back in the morning.
But this waiting room might as well be my home.It’s where my family is.And I don’t have any other home.
“What’s happening with my mom and dad and Lidia?”I ask Matteo.
He’s been dozing off in his seat, having long since abandoned the idea of trying to hold a conversation with me, since all he got was one- or two-word answers.
I’m still not OK with how good he makes me feel even though he’s the reason I lost everything.My mind and my body are still standing on polar opposites on that and I’m floating somewhere in between, unable to decide where to land.
“Things are gonna work out,” he mutters, opening his eyes just a crack.“We should try to get some sleep.Maybe even find a motel.”
“Go right ahead, but I’m staying here.”
He shrugs and closes his eyes again.I almost tell him that I’m serious, that he can go get a motel room, that I won’t try to run or anything—which I won’t since that ended badly once before.And I won’t go to the cops either since they’re clearly all in Ferro’s pocket.
I don’t say it though.And I don’t know if it’s because I don’t want to be alone or because I want him here with me.
“So what happened to your family, anyway?”I ask.
Maybe my voice is a little harsh, but I do really want to know.He’s been mentioning them a lot, trying to make me feel better about all this, and I’ve not been responding well to it.But I now know he suffered a great loss, and I do feel bad for him.Or at least one of the polar opposites of me does.
“They were all killed in a feud,” he says.
“Even the women?”
“Taken and married off,” he says, still not opening his eyes.“Some committed suicide before that could happen.”
“All except your sister?”
“She was the one the caused the feud,” he says, harshly.He sits up and stares at the opposite wall.“Rejected the guy she was supposed to marry, ran off with another, and we all paid the price.”
“And the guy she rejected killed your entire family?”I’m genuinely shocked at hearing this.“Why didn’t you just make her get married?Why didn’t she sacrifice herself?How could she just watch what was happening?”
He shakes his head, his hands balled into fists.“Arranged marriages weren’t our family’s way.And she was in love with someone else.She had a right to rebel.And by the time it all went down, she was too damaged to fix any of it,” he says.“Besides, we’d sent her to New York to live with relatives by then.”
“Still, I’d come back… if it was me, I mean.”
“Would you?”he asks, his eyes as sharp as the sarcasm in his voice.“Because from what I can see, you don’t much like doing things against your will.”
“That’s a low blow, you tried to kill my family,” I snap.“Of course I resent you for it.But because my family’s lives depend on me doing what I’m told, I’m doing it.Aren’t I?”
