“I’ll be back, J,” she tells him.
“What’s up, man?” I nod in his direction.
“Hey. How you been?”
We chat briefly before Hannah and I disappear into her office. I fall onto the old, grease-stained couch. “I fucked up.”
“What happened?”
“James and I…well, started something we shouldn’t have, in his office at work. A colleague came to the door. I hid under the desk, and the guy made it obvious he knew James had someone in there with him.”
“Fuck. That’s not good.”
“No shit.”
“He cool?” she asks.
“I don’t know him, but he seemed like it. He’s queer and actually has a little thing for James, but he seemed to think the whole thing was funny. I honestly don’t think he’ll say anything, and just because he knows someone was there doesn’t mean he knows it was a student. I just know James, and he’s losing his shit right now. I should have dropped his class earlier, and I sure as shit shouldn’t have tried to fuck him in his office.”
She cocks a brow at me. “You’re so nasty.”
I flip her off. “Now’s not the time for joking.”
“I know, but I’d like to remind you that there were two people in that office. James is an adult. He participated just as much as you. He made you promise not to drop his class. Youbothfucked up, and you’llbothhave to deal with the consequences. Yes, if this gets out, his will likely be more severe than yours, but he is an equal party in this relationship. You’re good at holding the blame for everything, but you need to cut that shit out.”
She’s right. Theoretically, I know that, but as his Dom, I should have done what was best for James. “I’m supposed to make sure he’s safe.”
“You’re only human. Cut yourself some slack.”
“God, this is so fucked.” I rub a hand over my face. “I think I’m falling in love with him, Han. And we’djustdecided to be more, and now this. He’ll run. He’ll freak out, and I can’t blame him.”
“Maybe he won’t.” She gives me a sad smile. “Maybe you’re wrong. Obviously, to him, you’re worth the risk. But again, I’m also going to need him to take some responsibilityhere. You two got yourselves into this situationtogether, and you need to worktogetherto get yourselves out of it. If he’s not prepared to do that, maybe he’s not good enough for you.” Hannah shrugs.
“He is.”
“Then he needs to prove it.”
I don’t have it in me to argue with her, so I ask if she needs any help around the shop. Hannah’s no fool and will take help when it’s offered, so I work with her and Jerome for a couple of hours, hoping that will take my mind off James, but it doesn’t.
I can’t stop myself from checking my phone from time to time, hoping for a text from him, but he hasn’t answered me yet. That doesn’t give me a whole lot of hope for where his head is at.
Hannah invites me over for dinner, but I tell her no and head back to my apartment instead. I shower, make dinner, then stare at my phone like a fucking idiot. Will he even answer when I call tonight? What’s going to happen to my relationship with Nash if James ends this?
I’m so lost in thought that I’m startled when my cell rings. It’s James, and suddenly I feel like I can breathe for the first time since thatknockat his office door.
“Hey. I’m—”
“I’m sorry,” he cuts me off. “I’m sorry for how I treated you afterward, and I’m sorry for putting you in that position in the first place. I never should have asked you to come to my office. You tried to tell me it was a bad idea, but—”
“But I went anyway,” I finish. “We were both in that room together. We both made a bad choice. Neither of us should be sorry, or we can both be sorry. The most important thing is how this will affect you.”
“Can we video call? I need to see you.”
Hearing those words does something to me, mends my broken pieces from earlier, maybe all the broken pieces I’ve ever had. It’s such an honor to be wanted by him, to be chosen by him, and I will spend the rest of my life cherishing that. “Yes. I’d like that…and you’re such a good boy for asking for what you need.”
“Thank you,” he says softly. “I’ll call you right back.”
He does, and I notice he’s in his car in the parking garage.
