Philip bit back a grimace along with the answer he wanted to give—none. But that wouldn’t do.
“I confess that I am still undecided.” Especially when a pair of green eyes fringed with long lashes were all he could see.
“Truly?” His aunt perched on the chair before his desk, her head tilted as if she found his reply curious. “I had the impression you intended to make a decision quickly.”
“I thought to do so.” He couldn’t help but shift in his chair, feeling much like a schoolboy caught with a frog in his pocket. “However, yesterday made me realize that perhaps I should attempt to come to know them better and put more thought into the matter.” Surely that sounded reasonable.
However, he couldn’t even remember their names let alone other details, except that they paled in comparison to Lady Eliza Chadwick.
How unfortunate that she’d come home to London at this particular time after so long away. He didn’t need excuses to prolong his decision about who should become his duchess.
“Are you having second thoughts?” His aunt lifted a brow in question.
“No.” Not exactly.
“Good.” She nodded in approval. “Your father and brother would be proud of you.”
That was what he wanted. Following in their path was the right thing to do. He just needed to take one step at a time even if the process was slower than he wanted.
“I couldn’t help but notice the way Lady Charlotte watched you,” his aunt continued.
“Oh?” He’d spoken briefly with her, but she hadn’t said anything in particular that he’d found memorable. He only thought of Oscar when he spoke with her.
“She mentioned how much you have come to act like your brother in the past few months.”
A well of emotion rolled through Philip at the words. That was a fine compliment and what he’d been trying to do.
His brother had represented everything good in the world. He’d wielded the power of his title, along with the one he would inherit, with care just like their father.
If only he hadn’t died.
Once again, the weight of the future sat heavily on Philip’s shoulders. It seemed impossible to attempt to fill their shoes, but he was determined to try. He wished he would’ve paid more attention to how they handled their responsibilities rather than focusing on his own pleasures even if it had seemed ridiculous to think there was a need to do so at the time.
“How kind of her to think so.” Philip only wished it were true.
“I believe the three sisters and their mother will attend the charity ball being held next week. Perhaps that will be a chance for you to spend more time coming to know them.”
“What charity does this ball aid?” Philip asked. He wanted to be selective in the ones he supported with the intent to select only a few so he could make a true difference by aiding them.
“The Orphaned Children of London. It is one to which your father donated.”
“Very well. Will you send our acceptance of the invitation?”
“Of course.”
Aunt Eleanor helped organize his social obligations and often accompanied him. He didn’t know what he’d do without her. Her opinion on members of Society and the events they hosted was invaluable since he hadn’t bothered to keep up on such things in the past.
“Will Markus be attending as well?” Philip hoped he wouldn’t. Keeping his cousin in line was nothing he relished. Markus had been between Philip and Oscar in age and resented them both.
Aunt Eleanor’s lips tightened even as she forced a smile. “I do believe so.”
Philip nodded, well aware Markus frustrated both of his parents with his drinking and gambling. He tended to say things that embarrassed them and others, much to their chagrin. Oscar had been adept at keeping him under control, but Philip had yet to master that skill. His parents’ efforts were less than effective.
None of Philip’s friends liked Markus. That hadn’t been a problem, but since inheriting, Philip had distanced himself from most of his unmarried friends except Winston. It had proven necessary even if it made him lonely. His other friends tempted him to return to life the way it had been, something he had to guard against even with Winston.
Before and After. Those were the two phases of his life it seemed. He wished he’d better appreciated the Before part while he’d had the chance.
They reviewed the schedule for the next seven days to determine which of the few events being held he would attend and why. The why had become particularly important. He no longer did anything simply because he wanted to. Responsibilities meant spending his time with purpose.
