I swear, if it had an eyebrow, it would have arched. Its lip definitely curled.
“Not a lover of bugs, eh? Want more fruit?” I asked, even as I knew better than to expect a reply. Apparently, I was working on becoming a reptile version of the crazy cat lady. I’d be safe so long as I didn’t acquire too many more lizards.
I brought my pet an overripe banana and a stale bagel I found in the fridge. After I placed them in the cage, I hit the washroom to deal with a call from nature. By the time I returned, bagel and banana? Gone.
“Where are you putting it all?” I murmured. Didn’t seem normal a lizard could eat more than its body weight.
“Shipment has arrived!” Tutu yelled, startling Tigger, who hissed and chittered.
“Coming,” I hollered back. I glanced at my lizard, hating to leave it alone now that we were almost bonding. “Want to come with me to work?” I’d just be unpacking the obsidian and placing some of it in the kiln.
I dangled the harness and leash in front of the tank. Its gaze narrowed, almost as if it understood what I planned.
“It will be fine. You’ll see. The harness won’t hurt, and this way, you get some time outside the cage,” I crooned as I lifted the lid and brought the straps near. Tigger didn’t move, merely stared and shook its head. So cute.
“It’s not a big deal. Dogs have to wear them every time they go out.” I kept my tone low and calming as I fitted the straps over Tigger’s head and got it to cooperate enough that its arms ended up in the right spot. I then clipped the leash to the ring on the back before scooping up my new lizard and cradling it to my chest.
It sighed heavily but didn’t struggle or attempt to leap from my arms. “That’s a good lizard. Off to work we go.”
As I exited the house, I noticed the pickup truck parked in front of the hangar. Tutu stood watching as two men unloaded a pair of crates and carried them inside. I placed Tigger on my shoulder and clipped the leash to my belt loop before striding in after them. Soon as we entered, my lizard tucked against my neck—still not biting. Good thing, because can you imagine the headline if it tore open my jugular? Mouse-sized lizard murders dumb woman who should have listened to her grandfather.
While Tutu made the men pry open the crates to verify the contents, I checked on the tabletop. Tutu had already removed it from the kiln and placed it on top of one of the side tables. I knew it must have passed his assessment already, otherwise I would have heard about it, so I skipped doing my own inspection and headed for the smaller of our cooling kilns to remove the bowl and inspect it.
“Ooh, isn’t that pretty.” The bowl had cooled nicely, the swirl of colors giving it some flair. “What do you think, Tigger?”
My reptile leaned forward and snorted before chittering. “I agree it’s gorgeous.” Yes, I was pretending it gave me a compliment.
I lifted the bowl and carried it to the fancy shelf, which, for the curious, was a lovely wooden length of wood with a rough bark edge that sat atop a stool with a white backboard behind. I set the bowl upon it and pulled out my phone to take pictures. I clicked several from different angles. I’d choose the best one later and load it onto our website.
Before I could put my phone away, Tigger ran down my arm and grabbed hold of my thumb to prevent itself from falling. It seemed fascinated by my cellular device.
“Such a curious fellow. Maybe I should have named you George.” Struck by an idea, I placed Tigger in the bowl and aimed my camera. “Say cheese.”
It cocked its head.
Click. I tapped the picture I’d just taken and flipped my phone around so Tigger could see the screen. “See how cute you are.”
It recoiled, but only for a second, before inching closer and reaching out to pat the screen.
“That’s you. Tigger.”
I whirled my phone and snapped a new image, this time of myself before showing it. “And this is me, Iolana.”
Its mouth rounded.
“It’s called a picture, and I take it with the camera on my phone.” Yeah, I knew I strayed into crazy-lizard-lady territory the way I explained it to Tigger, but in my defense, it seemed really interested.
“What is that thing doing in here?” barked Tutu, coming up behind me.
“That thing has a name. Tigger.”
“I don’t care. You’re supposed to be working.”
“I am. The ruined batch from yesterday is now a bowl you can charge an exorbitant amount for.”
“It’s not hideous,” Tutu grudgingly declared, “but get the lizard out of it before it shits on something and ruins it.”
Fair point. Given how much Tigger had eaten, it would likely end up being a massive one. I scooped up my lizard and placed it back on my shoulder.
