“As my servant, you are expected to cater to my every whim.”
“With that kind of attitude, you won’t be getting any cheesy puffs tonight.”
“You will give them to me, plus something sweet. Not fruit. I desire something with actual sugar.”
“I can probably arrange that, but first, a few questions, starting with, how come you’re talking all of a sudden?”
“It took me time after my hatching to learn your language. English didn’t exist in the era of my maternal progenitor.”
“Your what?”
“What you call mother.”
“English has been around in some form for thousands of years. How long ago did she lay your egg?”
“Thousands of years, obviously,” I drawled.
“That’s how long it takes to hatch?”
“That’s how long it took to achieve the proper temperature to cure my egg.” I sighed. “So many questions. Obviously, it’s been some time since my kind roamed the skies keeping humanity in line. Therefore, listen carefully, as I won’t repeat myself. I am a dragon, recently hatched in your kiln, which is very degrading, by the way. I hope the fact you heated me unnaturally won’t affect my growth. Hatchlings are born with the knowledge of our egg layer. Anything she might have learned is passed on to us, without the personal memories attached, of course. A dragon is the mightiest of beasts?—”
She, of course, had to interrupt. “How can you be so mighty when none exist?”
“Because people hunt us. They seek us out that they might murder us for glory and steal our hoard. Alas, we are not without vulnerability, especially when we are still in our growth phase. I will have to go through many…” I paused, lacking the English word.
Iolana supplied it. “If you mean shedding of skin, it’s called a molting.”
“As I was saying, I will experience several moltings before I achieve my full potential. Those will come quickly so long as I’m well fed. So far, you’ve been doing an adequate job of it, but know that my needs will increase with each layer I shed. As I grow in size, so will my appetite.”
“Given how much you already eat, I don’t see how I’m going to afford the increase to my food budget. Unless you’re planning to pay for your meals out of your hoard.”
It was as if she intentionally goaded me about my lack. My teeth gritted as I growled, “I don’t yet have one, as I am only a few days old.”
“Then guess you’ll be staying puny because I am not wasting my paychecks on groceries for a creature who can’t even say thank you.”
“You wish thanks for doing your duty?” What an astonishing concept.
“All I’ve heard so far is me, me, me. What do I get out of this?”
“The honor of serving me.”
“Yeah, no thanks.”
“The blessing of my presence.”
“I liked you a lot more when I thought you were a cute lizard and not an obnoxious, arrogant, rude jerk.”
I recoiled and couldn’t help but blurt out, “You don’t like me?”
“Not right now, I don’t. I don’t suppose you could go back to making adorable noises and pretending you’re cuddly.”
“We can still cuddle, but I will not become mute.”
“Then how about trying to be polite? You know, not saying things that are meant to denigrate me.”
While I wanted to rebuke and put Iolana in her place, it occurred to me that I still needed her. “If I must.”
“Yes, you must. Otherwise, you’ll be looking for someone else to boss around. Understood?”
