“Fuck!”
Callan winces, but he doesn’t say anything. He just watches me for a beat before stepping back like he’s giving me space to bleed out quietly.
“You can’t let her get to you like this, Knox.” There’s steel threaded through his voice now. “It’s exactly what she wants.”
Yeah. I know that. I know it in my fucking bones. But knowing it doesn’t stop the guilt from churning through me.
The image of Juliette’s face—hurt, blindsided, and devastated—replays in my mind over and over. The guilt sinks deeper. I can barely breathe. The air’s too thick with everything I’ve fucked up.
The damage is done.
It’s like I’m being torn apart from the inside out. In the dizzying haze of it all, my voice cracks. “I can’t lose her, Cal.”
The rage that drives me, that fire burning in my chest, fizzles out, leaving behind nothing but the bitter, awful truth.
Callan shifts uncomfortably. “I don’t know what to say,” he admits. “You need to talk to Juliette.”
I don’t answer right away. I already know she won’t listen to me. Her past is etched with scars. Far too much pain and too many broken promises exist in those planes. I’ve spent hours, days,weekstrying to prove I’m nothing like the ones who’ve torn her apart. But now? Now I’ve done something worse. I’ve shattered her trust. I’ve become another person she can’t rely on.
“You didn’t see her face. Hear what she said. I’ve ruined everything.”
His gaze hardens, but his voice stays steady. “You’re not the bastard Hallie’s trying to paint you as. Yeah, you screwed up by not coming clean sooner, but she deserves to hear the truth from you now.”
His words spark the smallest flicker of hope, but it dies almost instantly, smothered by the weight of doubt. I don’t see how this can be fixed.
“The truth is that I’m married.” The words come out flat. “And I chose not to tell her. I thought I could get my shit together, get things straight before I dragged her into it…but it backfired.”
I press on, my voice a little rougher now. “You know why Juliette’s single? Her ex-fiancé cheated on her, Cal. Made her feel small. Made her feelless than.And now I’m just another goddamn liar in a long line of them.”
Cal’s face tightens with a wince. He didn’t know that part of her story, and the silence that follows scrapes down my spinelike sandpaper. My jaw clenches so hard it aches, but it’s the resentment towardmyselfthat really gets me.
“And now you see the problem,” I mutter, my frustrations spilling out as I rub a hand over my face and try to push the fury out of my system. “Thanks for stepping in, Cal. I need to call Finn and figure out where they ended up. You get back to the party. This was supposed to be a good night.”
He doesn’t argue. Doesn’t offer more advice or throw me a tired cliché about how I’ll figure it out. He claps a hand on my shoulder before walking out, swinging the door shut behind him.
I stare at it for half a second before dragging in a breath. There’s no use standing here like an idiot.
I bend down, scoop my phone off the floor where it landed, and dial Finn’s number.
But it’s not Finn who answers. It’s Elsie.
And shit, she isfurious.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” she snaps. “I warned you, Knox. Iwarnedyou what would happen if you kept lying to her.”
Her voice is shrewd enough to cut through bone, every word landing like a slap I absolutely deserve. “I know heartbreak when I see it, and what she’s going through right now? It’s a hundred times worse. I don’t even know how you let it get this far, but Christ, you’ve made an absolute mess.”
“I thought I was protecting her.”
There’s a pause. Then a low, humorless laugh. “Protecting her?” she echoes. “She’s alreadyinit, Knox. She’s been in your mess since the second she let you close enough to matter.”
Every word hits dead center. Because she’s right.
My throat burns when I finally say it. Raw, real, and too goddamn late.
“Ilove her, Elsie.”
There’s a long pause on the other end. “You, what?”
