She sipped from a straw that jutted out from a mound of fresh flowers, fruit, and colorful umbrellas. “Lots of titties on this beach. Nobody cares about my two fried eggs, Dec. Please shut the fuck up.”
“You’re right,” I argued, sitting my drink down and pulling the string on my shorts. “They probly won’t care about my bollocks, either.” Bridget whipped her head around and lowered her sunglasses.
“Excuse me. What the hell are you doing?” I slid the waist of my shorts down a bit, showing off the far end of the trail she likes to follow elsewhere. “Uh-uh…not happening.”
“But I have to sit here and hold your towel while you flash all of Mexico withmyboobs?! Eggbert and Cluckles are for my eyes only, Bridget Byrne.”
Pink daiquiri sprayed out of her mouth and she covered it, leaning over her beach chair and choking. “I’m sorry,what?!”
“You heard me. They’remine. So, unless you wanna share my testicles…I suggest you cover yourchesticles. End of.”Extremely proud of myself, I righted my trunks and leaned back in my chair, fixing my arms behind my head.
“Eggbert and Cluckles?” she snorted, giving way to more snorts…more giggles.
“You just said—you know what? Doesn’t matter. Don’t talk about my boobs like that. They’re the second most precious thing on your body. Better start treatin’ ‘em with respect…or I’ll take your arse back to Witherle and remind you what punishment feels like.”
The little brat smiled while she made a show of rolling her tongue around her straw…I’ll have to remind myself to beat Malek’s ass for rubbing off on her. “It’s a lot warmer outhere, though…and I’ve been rather rotten.”
“Keep that shit up. Go ahead. They’ll see a lot more than your tits.”
“Kinky,” she winked, sipping.
I relaxed and started trying to force images in my mind ofSimonin a speedo, prostate exams, things with more than four legs, and the infamous ‘blue waffle’ that I told Mal…works like a charm for an unwanted boner. He finally did find that out the hard way, I’ve heard.
“Another drink, sir?” A sweet voice asked, bulldozing all my thoughts. I peeked up to see our waitress standing at the end of my chair and reaching for my empty glass.
“Sure.Gracias.” I handed it over and accepted what she gave me, exchanging polite smiles and tasting it before I sat it in the hole I made in the sand.
“Somethin’ wrong with your eyes,Señorita?”
Oh, shit. Goddammit.
Our waitress looked confused…and a little caught off guard by Bridget’s tone. I slid my sunglasses off and rolled my head towards my aggressive lassie. “Bridget…don’t.”
“It’s impressive, isn’t it? He’s not hard for you, bitch. Shoo.”
“I—I wasn’t…” Fuckin’ Bridget…she did that shit on purpose. Now the poor girlhadto look at it. What a clever little minx. Always gotta have her way.Textbookpsycho.
“Bridget.”
Too late.
She plunked her drink down on the little table and eased her sunglasses off, standing up from her chair before I could wrestle my hard-on to get the fuck outtamine. The poor waitress boggled her eyes and almost dropped her tray full of drinks as she started backing away from my lioness, who prowled towards her with her painted maw out, ready to attack. I tried…I really did, but you tell me how well it works out for you when you’re forced to fight with your hard cock and tripping over towels and beach bags. I ended up with a mouthful of fucking sand and watched the waitress back herself into the tide, losing her balance and falling—right into Simon’s fuckinglap. Bridget stopped in her tracks.
“…Hi…” Simon smiled, creepy as ever.
Is that…is she fucking smiling? With teeth?
“Hola.”
Crystal blue water splashed over their lower halves, and he raised his drink to save it…they both giggled at each other.
“Oh, you’ve gotta be kidding me,” Bridget humphed, parking her hands on her hips. “No fucking way.”
I buried my face back in the sand, laughing my ass off.
Our resort has a downstairs venue, and we’ve forgone the late-night fiestas for the past week, venturing out and findingother things to do. Tonight, we decided to be part of the local party and turnall the wayup. First dinner, complete with live music and dancers…and then I’m gonna loosen up. It’s unreal how much quicker you get drunk after being in the sun all day. Makes me wonder how we Irish lads got it so wrong all our lives. This is heaven—um…no…cielo.
“Don’t ever lemme eat trash Mexican food again. This is the best shite I’ve ever eaten…aside from yoursnatch.” I wagged my brows, shoveling some kinda chicken with black beans into my mouth and Bridget snickered across the table.
