“How far back should I recount my sins toward you?”
“Just tonight.”
“Rather than discuss it with you because I didn’t like your initial decision, I took it upon myself to handle things. I knew how strongly you’d object, so I drugged you.”
Her face drains of color as she admits the transgression. Perspiration beads along her hairline, and goosebumps form on her arms and legs. I grow concerned as I see her physical reaction, but I’m scared when she trembles enough to shake.
“Vita?”
“I’m so, so sorry. I know you said you’d forgive me, but what if you decide you can’t? What if you can’t get over the betrayal? What if?—”
“What if I love you,chiquita?”
I didn’t plan those words; they just sorta tumbled out.
“Really?”
“Yes, little one. I love you.”
“How?”
I chuckle, even though I know I shouldn’t.
“You’ve worked your way into my heart. We haven’t known each other nearly long enough by most people’s measure. But time isn’t a luxury to them. It is for us. I won’t waste it wondering if I’m rushing. I’m in my thirties, and until you, I’d met no one who grabbed and held my attention like you. You’re my first and last thought every day. I’d met no one outside my family who makes me want to take care of them or be protective of them. No one I’d trust to walk into battle alongside. No one who makes my heart and body ache to be near them. No one who feels like a partner. You might not feel the sa?—”
“Shh.”
She puts her right index finger against my lips as her left hand cups my chin, lifting it.
“I love you too.”
“You do?”
She chuckles at my surprise. I mean, I’ve wanted her to love me back since I began putting the pieces together that I’ve fallen in love with her. I just didn’t expect her to get to the same place as me so quickly.
“I feel like I’ve lived a hundred lives since graduating university. At least twenty different personas. I’ve mingled among high-society and dregs of society. I’ve been all over the world. I’ve met no other man who makes me excited to see him. I’ve met no other man who makes me feel cared for, makes me feel special and valued. I trust next to no one, but I trust you. When I realized that, I knew I was already in love with you.”
She gives me a peck on the lips before sliding off my lap. She stands beside my legs and watches me expectantly.
“I’m going to use my hand, but I’m inclined to use something else too. I don’t know what your threshold for pain is or what kinds of implements you’re comfortable with.”
“It’s pretty high for most forms of pain. I’m fine with belts, crops, whips, floggers, hairbrushes, paddles. That sort of stuff.”
“Which do you want tonight? Belt or hairbrush? Wooden spoon or plastic spatula are also options. I don’t keep a stash of BDSM toys or implements here. I’ve never had a woman here before.”
“Really?”
“I belong to a club and have had past arrangements, but they never came here. This is my sanctuary from the world. I also don’t trust strangers in my home. There are too many risks.”
“You trust me here.”
“You are hardly a stranger. You are part of my sanctuary.”
Despite what we’ve faced together, she’s still a reprieve from reality. I suppose she’s my safe space. I want her to be part of my family, and they’re the only ones welcome here.
“You choose, Daddy.”
The trust in her gaze is everything to me. I rise and cup the back of her neck as I kiss her forehead.
