All of that was family. It wasn’t DNA, or obligation, or financialentanglement. It was choice: choosing to show up. It was seeing and being seen. Family was love that was freely given instead of conditionally withheld.
Janie’s phone buzzed again.
I’m downstairs. Come when you’re readyx
I’ll be down in a few minutes x
Janie gathered her things and turned off her desk lamp. She glanced around her office, at the law degree on the wall, at the photos of Hannah and of the triplets on her desk, and then at the stack of case files that represented her career, which was still her passion and her choice, and something she was damn good at despite her mother’s doubts.
This was her life, one she had built for herself. And it was great. It was enough.Shewas enough.
Janie walked out of her office, locked the door behind her, and headed for the elevators. For Hannah. For home. For the family she’d chosen and who’d chosen her back. And she smiled widely.Nowthe nightmare was truly over, and she could concentrate on becoming the person she’d always wanted to be.
CHAPTER 26
Solo satin her truck outside Janie’s office building, engine idling, watching the glass doors for her wife to emerge so she could get her home, hold her tight, and make sure she was actually okay.
The text about Janie’s mother had hit Solo like a physical blow, not because it was bad news, but because she knew what it would’ve cost Janie to do that. To finally stand up to the woman who’d spent Janie’s entire life making her feel small and never nearly good enough.
She wanted to hunt down Janie’s mother and tell her exactly what she thought of her exploitation of her daughter’s vulnerabilities. She’d wanted to do something, anything, to fix this for Janie. But Janie had spent her whole life with people trying to tell her what to do and what choices to make. What she needed now was someone to just be there and “hold space,” as Rae called it, for whatever she was feeling. Solo had to let Janie process in her own time and in her own way.
So she sat in the gentle heat of the sun shining through her windshield, gripping the steering wheel hard, heart in her throat, hoping this wouldn’t push her back into the oblivion of a deep depression.
When the doors finally opened and Janie walked out, Solo’s breath caught. Janie lookeddifferent. She didn’t appear to be the broken, dejected daughter like Solo had feared. There was no hint of devastation, or fragility, or any of the things Solo had braced herself for.
Janie looked tired, sure. That was a constant state of being when you were raising triplets and working full time. But she also looked lighter somehow. Like the impossibleweight of her mother’s expectations were no longer bearing down on her.
Solo leaned across to push open the passenger door, and Janie climbed in. For a moment, they just looked at each other, with Solo taking in Janie’s red-rimmed eyes and careful composure, scanning for cracks in case Janie was hanging onto an outward professional appearance while she disintegrated inside.
“Hi,” Janie said finally.
“Hi.” Solo tucked a strand of hair behind Janie’s ear. “You okay?”
“I don’t know. Maybe.” Janie’s laugh was shaky. “I told my mother I was done with her, and I didn’t need her anymore. When she left, I called Rae, and now you’re here, and I’m wondering if I actually disowned my own mother or if I hallucinated the whole thing.”
“You did it.” Solo cupped Janie’s face, sure it was true. “You stood up for yourself. That’s amazing.”
Janie’s eyes filled with tears. “Why do I feel so strange about it? I should feel good, right? Relieved at least. But I just feel...like I’m in some sort of limbo, and I have no idea what’s supposed to happen next.”
Solo didn’t respond for a second while she tried to pull up another kernel of knowledge she’d learned from Rae. “You’ve spent your entire life in survival mode around your mother. Maybe your body doesn’t know what to do with the feeling of being safe from her yet. It’ll take time.” She stroked Janie’s cheekbone with her thumb. “And that’s okay. We’ve got plenty of that together.”
Janie nodded and put on her seatbelt. “Can we go home? I just want to be with you.”
“Yeah. Of course.” Solo put the car in gear and pulled out into traffic. They drove in silence for a while, Janie staring out the window at the city passing by, and Solo stealing glances at her whenever she could take her eyes off the road.
“Carmen has the girls until eight,” Janie said eventually. “Sheand Tom took them to the park, and then they’re going to get pizza. He texted while I was waiting for you.”
Solo smiled. “So we have the house to ourselves for a few hours.”
“Yeah.” Janie glanced at her briefly. “Would it be okay if you stayed with me for a little while? I know you probably need to get back to the garage?—”
“The garage will be fine without me. Gabe and Shay have everything under control; they always do.” Solo took Janie’s hand and pressed it to her lips. “I’m exactly where I need to be.”
They pulled in to their parking spot twenty minutes later, and some of Solo’s own tension eased as soon as she saw their house. Home. It was their safe place, the space they’d built together and nearly lost but were building again, with stronger foundations this time.
Inside, Solo helped Janie out of her suit jacket and watched her set down her bag with the kind of careful precision that indicated she was holding herself together through sheer force of will. Solo recognized that look. She’d seen it on Janie’s face a hundred times over the past few weeks. One wrong word, and she’d completely fall apart. “Come here,” she said, opening her arms.
Janie walked into them like she’d been waiting for permission, and then she was pressed against Solo’s chest, shaking and making small, wounded sounds that shattered Solo’s heart into pieces. “I’ve got you,” she murmured into Janie’s hair. “You’re safe, I promise.”
