Janie nodded and tried to soak up Rae’s positivity. The niggling doubt that her mother was going to ruin everything wouldn’t fade or quiet though. They talked some more about Janie’s depression and methods for Hannah to support her, andRae gently ended the session.
Out in the parking lot, Hannah took Janie’s hand. “You’re sure about tonight?”
“I’m sure,” Janie said and got in the car. “I want to be with you and the girls.”
“Then I’ll see you at home.” Hannah closed the car door, her smile so full of hope it made Janie’s chest ache.
On Thursday morning, Janie woke to the sound of small feet padding down the hallway and Tia’s voice calling “Mommy! Mommy!” She rolled over, reaching across the bed to find Hannah was already gone, likely heading off the triplets before they could invade their bedroom.
“Give Mommy five more minutes,” Hannah said in the hallway. “She’s still sleeping.”
Janie threw back the comforter and swung her legs out of bed, powered by the desire to see the beautiful faces that belonged to those voices. She pulled on a pair of sweatpants and headed to the triplets’ room, where she found Hannah changing Chloe’s diaper while Tia and Luna bounced impatiently on Tia’s bed. She stood in the doorway and watched for a little while, thinking that she’d almost lost all of it. “Morning.”
Three little faces lit up. “Mommy!”
Tia and Luna scrambled over the cot’s lowered side and wrapped their small arms around her legs, their voices competing to tell her things about their dreams, and their stuffed animals, and the birds they could hear outside.
Hannah looked up from the changing table and smiled softly, her gaze warm and full of love. “Good morning.”
“Morning.” Janie scooped up Luna and Tia, breathing in their sweet scent. “Did everyone sleep okay?”
“Like three little logs, right?” Hannah finished with the diaper and lifted Chloe down. “Want to help with breakfast?”
“Yes. Absolutely.”
They moved downstairs together, the triplets trailing between them, and fell into a rhythm that seemed like a distant memory,one Janie’s depression had tried to force her to forget. Hannah started coffee while Janie filled sippy cups with milk. Hannah pulled out eggs and bread, and Janie settled the girls at their little table with coloring books to keep them occupied. She and Hannah moved around each other in the kitchen with ease, and something tight in Janie’s chest unfurled, as if ready to embrace their renewed future.
This was what she’d been missing out on with her self-imposed isolation. Not just being with the girls but the two of them as a team.
Tom appeared in the doorway, already dressed for the day. “Well, this is a nice sight,” he said, smiling at them. “Both my girls making breakfast.”
“Morning, Tom,” Janie said and sank into his strong embrace.
“Good to have you here, Janie.” He hugged her tighter. “The house feels complete when you’re in it.”
“Thank you,” was all she could manage in response, and even that came out croaky and weak. She caught Hannah’s gaze, and the combination brought tears to her eyes. Janie looked away quickly and concentrated on the chaos of their breakfast routine instead of the overwhelming beauty ofbelonging.
They ate breakfast together, with the triplets being overly demanding: more juice, more toast, help with cutting their eggs into even smaller pieces. Janie happily indulged them, recognizing their behavior for what it was.
“They’ll get used to that,” Hannah said.
“They’re just acting out a little.” Janie ruffled Tia’s hair and was rewarded with a huge smile. “They’ll calm down when they realize I’m here to stay.” Even as she said it, the cogs began to whir. What was she doing, going back to the apartment tonight? Why separate herself from them again when everything felt so good? And if it got too much, she could always leave once the kids were in bed.
Carmen arrived at eight to take over, and Hannah and Janie got ready for work with the efficiency of having done this dancea thousand times before.
At the door, Hannah kissed Janie goodbye with a passionate intensity that made Carmen tactfully turn her attention to the triplets.
“See you tomorrow,” Hannah murmured.
Janie grasped a handful of Hannah’s tee and pulled her close. “Or I could come back tonight,” she said without overthinking the implications.
Hannah’s eyes brightened, and she grinned widely. “Tonight? Are you sure?”
Janie nodded then kissed her hard. “And maybe there could be less sleeping,” she whispered and nibbled Hannah’s ear. Hannah practically melted against her.
“Aw, that’s not fair.”
“It’s plenty fair when it’s a promise of more to come.” Janie gave Hannah’s chest a light shove. “Go, paint some magic.”
