I open my door and find the strength to close it, putting some much-needed space between us. One more minute in his presence, and I might have lost my mind and pulled him into my apartment and attacked him.
Seconds after my door closes, it flies open. I turn half expecting to see Harrison standing there like a crazed man, unable to wait another minute for me, but it’s Zoe. A wave of disappointment flows through me, but I push it aside.
“Holy shit, was that him? Mr. Hottie?”
I nod with a goofy grin. The last hour seems almost surreal—everything from my meeting with a very understanding Rita to Harrison and his feral hunger for me. If my lips weren’t still swollen from his kisses, I could almost convince myself it was just another of my vivid dreams.
“Wow. Your description of him didn’t do him justice. He’s… wow,” Zoe says, fanning herself.
“Yeah… he’s pretty wow.”
“So does him dropping you off mean you’ve decided not to go with the match Rita paired you with?”
“I guess it does. That reminds me I need to call her and ask her to shred my letter…”
I quickly dial Rita’s number, not wanting to put it off a second longer than necessary. “Rita, hi, this is Olive…”
“Oh, hi Olive, is something wrong?” she asks, sounding concerned.
“Not at all… I’ve just decided that I don’t want to reach out to the man you’ve matched me with at this time.”
“Oh, dear. Well, that’s going to be a bit of a problem because he’s already picked up your letter, and he seems very excited… I suppose I could call him and tell him there’s been a mistake.”
Guilt rushes through me, and I’m trapped by indecision. My body is one hundred percent begging for Harrison. On the other hand, my heart is saying Rita’s match is the safe way to go. Now that Harrison isn’t within touching distance, I can think more clearly. I’m no less conflicted, but at least my brain is back in control.
“No… no, that’s okay. I look forward to hearing from him…” I say even though the guilt is suffocating.
Rita lets out a relieved sigh. “That’s great. I have a good feeling about this one.”
I force a little cheer in my voice. “I’m glad to hear that. Thank you again for matching me…”
“You’re very welcome, dear. I’ll be in touch as soon as your match writes.”
“Thanks. I look forward to your call.” We say quick goodbyes and hang up.
Fuck me. This is a mess.
Zoe gives me an incredulous look. “You’re still going through with the match? What about Mr. Hotstuff?”
I collapse into a kitchen chair and thump my head down on the table in front of me. “I don’t know what I’m doing!”
Zoe laughs. “It sounds like you’re having your cake and eating it too.”
“Oh God, you’re right. I can’t do this. I’m not equipped to eat the cake… I’m barely equipped to have the cake!” I say, sounding a little hysterical.
“Calm down, it’s going to be okay. It’s not like you have to see Harrison again.”
I look up at her with a wince. “I sort of have a date with him tonight.”
Zoe’s lips tilt up in a knowing smirk. “Good for you, girl!”
“But what about my cake?” I whine.
“Your cake isn’t in the picture yet. Just eat the stolen cake and then see if the cake you ordered is any good once it gets here. There are no rules with cake.”
“That sounds like a lot of cake…”
She smiles at me. “There is never enough cake.”
