“She’s beautiful.”
“Isn’t she?” She looks at the picture with admiration that has my eyes glistening. The love and pain in her eyes speaks volumes. I examine the picture, leaving the silence for her to take reins on how she wants the rest of the conversation to go.
“It was a cliché. My period was late. I took a test, and it was clear as day positive. I was waiting to tell Cole because I wanted it to be special. I wanted him to beexcited.” She smiles sadly. “I know he didn’t love me the way I love him, but I hoped that maybe this would make him fall in love with me the way I always hoped he would. And I know that’s awful to think but regardless, we still love one another, even if just as friends. We stillsharelove. That baby would’ve been loved no matter what. With our family, they wouldn’t know anything else, even if their parents weren’t together. I was actually excited, but then I started bleeding.”
I’ve held one too many mothers crying in my arms as their baby, slowly and painfully, was taken from their body in a bloody mess. To think Sam had to go through that.I’m so sorry Sam.
“Macey took me to the emergency room where I learned I was miscarrying. I already knew before they even confirmed it. I mean, why else would I be bleeding so much? Anyways, she is the only one who knows. I never told Cole because I felt like it would be too painful for him to know. Why tell him anyways since she no longer existed?” Sam traces a finger along the outline of her baby in the sonogram.
“Sam… I’m so sorry.” In my experience, I learned there was absolutely nothing more you could say. I never felt I had a maternal instinct and I certainly never pegged Sam to, either. But the way she looks at the picture tells me everything I need to know about the love of a mother.
“It’s okay. I sometimes wonder if he knew. Because ever since then, he’s been so off towards me. Or maybe it’s because he regrets hooking up. Who knows.”
“Do you ever think you’ll tell him?”
“No. There’s no point. This was a year ago, anyway. If I could do it over, I would’ve told him as soon as I found out. It would’ve been nice to experience that with him even if it was for a brief moment. I know he would’ve wanted it. Even if as friends, even if as more, he would’ve wanted it.”
I nod in understanding. “You’d make such a good mom, Sam. I can’t wait to see that day come for you.”
“Does that mean you’re going to stay here?” She raises an eyebrow.
“Slow down there,” I laugh.
“Can I use this to guilt trip you now?” She laughs.
I just roll my eyes. “Again, that’s not very, stay low key, running from your abusive ex of me, now is it?”
“I’ll kick his ass, don’t worry.” She places the sonogram back into the box where the pregnancy test lays, along with a little onesie inside. My heart cracks.
I wrap my arms around her. “I’m so thankful for you.”
“You too, Sunny.” She hugs me back.
Tying my hair into a curly mess atop my head, I look in the mirror at a girl who has no clue how to fight. I found my way out of a situation where luck somehow had my hand. Luck won’t be my reliance anymore, and skill will be in my back pocket if the situation arises again. Now that I know Ryan is alive, the chances of that are so much greater.
That’s why I took up Tyler’s offer to train at his gym with him and the guys. It’ll be nice knowing I can have some type of leverage if needed.
My phone buzzes on the bathroom counter, drawing my attention from the stranger in the mirror to my screen with Tyler’s name on it.
I’m so sorry, I’ll be running a bit late due to work. Cole and Anthony will be there. Cole is on his way to pick you up. You are not walking. Please don’t fight me on this, Sunny.
I blink, and before I can type out an argument, a knock on my door halts me.
Gathering my things, I shoot a text to Tyler.
Fine. But only for tonight. I’m expecting something to make up for your lack of presence.
And what might that be, little fire?
A smirk pulls my lips.
I’ll come up with something.
If you can’t think of anything, I have a whole list of ways I can make it up to you.
I bite the inside of my cheek.
A whole list, huh? What might those things be?
