No fight.
Nofire.
She leans back into the seat with a huff, finally realizing I won’t budge on this topic. The remainder of the drive is silent and I’m grateful for the quiet. But her damn hands still keep trying to toy with me. Running through my hair. Tracing circles on my hand. Rubbing my thigh and going up a little too high.
I keep my eyes on the road, trying to not acknowledge it. But my fucking dick decides otherwise as it twitches in my pants. I hate myself for it.
Just your body reacting.
She lives in a luxury condo her parents still pay for. When we pull up, I send a silent prayer to whatever exists that she won’t try to convince me to move in here. Yet, I can’t imagine allowing her in my home. There’s too many precious memories there I refuse for her to taint.
I put the car in park and hop out to open her door. The damp cold is prevalent with the cloud that forms around me with each of my labored breaths. I offer a hand to get her out of the truck, and she smiles at me like it’s the kindest gesture.
“Come inside.” She holds my hand, looking up at me.
All I can imagine is Sunny looking up at me with her big blue-green eyes round as she observes my face.
Each beat of my heart brings a reminder of the ache. I won’t move on from her. My heart resurrected from a grave I shoved it into the moment I laid eyes on Sunny, giving it a reason to start beating again. But now it aches as it slowly loses its lifeline, desperate for her again.
I shake my head. “No. Not tonight.”
“Come on,” she gently coaxes me, tugging on my hand. “We need to celebrate. And I need to thank you for this gorgeous ring.”
I run a hand over my face. “I’m tired, Shelby. It’s been a long day.”
“I can make you feel better.” She leans into me.
No you can’t.
She licks her lips, readying them for mine. I know what she wants. I’m just not sure if I can give it to her.
“Come on, Tyler. Just come inside. Nothing has to happen.OrI can do all the work. Let me show you how grateful I am for this ring,” she pleads seductively with her hands on my chest, rubbing up and down. But something in her eyes tells me otherwise. A small smile curves on her red lips when words don’t leave my mouth.
I know when I’d do this with Shelby it’ll be with my hand pressing her face down on the mattress. There’s no fucking way I can watch what I’m doing and be okay with it. There’s no way I can fuck her and not think of Sunny the whole god damn time. I’ll fuck her feeling like I’m betraying the love of my life.
But she made it clear what she wants, what her intentions are. She is going to stay running around in her labyrinth, never finding a way out, so I may as well, too.
I look up to the sky that’s now polluted with light from the condos as I contemplate. There are no stars for me to wish on tonight. Nothing to hear my final cry.
Let me let you go.
I fist Shelby’s hair with one hand, maybe a bit too firmly, yanking her to look up at me. Her lips part, waiting for mine. Feeling my jaw clench at the sight, I swallow the knot in my throat.
A smile creeps on her face, and I fucking hate it. Her hand clutches my shirt as my hand tightens in her hair, keeping the other deep in my pocket to prevent myself from strangling her. Take her air the way she has taken so much from me.
“Okay,” I breathe.
I toss my keys to the valet driver as Shelby leads me inside her building, tugging me one way while my heart is being pulled another.
CHAPTER FIFTY-SIX
TYLER
She opensher apartment door and leads me in by my hand. I step into the familiar place with a weight sitting on my chest. It feels wrong, so fucking wrong. This never was an issue before.
Before her.
If I don’t do this now, I’m not sure I ever will be able to. If I don’t do this now, Shelby will start suspecting too much. I don’t need her running to her daddy, telling him her fiancé is in love with another woman, posing more of a threat to my little fire when she’s already running from so much.
