Without looking at her, I ask, “Would you like to get on your knees for me?”
“Yes, Sir.”
“Please do.”
She’s quick to jump up, like she’s only been pretending to relax but was actually waiting for my next command.
Stopping immediately beside me, Sutton waits.
It’s such an interesting contrast to who I know her to be in the real world, and I smile smugly beneath my mask because I’m a lucky motherfucker to get to see both versions of her.
She lowers onto the pillow to the left of my chair and I swivel slowly toward her, positioning my legs on either side of her. “When we were in that viewing room,” I begin, “you gave me green as your color, but you continued trying to get away from me.”
She licks her lips, waiting, and I watch her eyes light up at the memory.
“Tell me why you said one thing, but your body did the opposite.” I know why, but I need to hear her say it.Sheneeds to understand the dichotomy of wanting what she wants even when her body—or her mind—tries to argue. Discussing this will help with our relationship going forward, and dissecting thewhysandhowsof it all will help her gain a deeper knowledge of what she truly wants and needs as my submissive.
“Um…” A thoughtful crease forms between her eyebrows and she bites down on that bottom lip as she focuses on my thigh, considering what I’ve asked of her. “I don’t really know why I was trying to get away, Sir.”
I reach for her, running my hand through her dark hair, then cupping her cheek so I can lift those honeyed-amber eyes to meet mine. “Did you want to escape me?”
Her eyes widen. “No, Dominus, not at all.”
I rub my thumb over her lips, my mouth watering at the way she parts them for me. The desire to kiss this woman remains an ever-growing, demanding need. It’s what I dream about when I close my eyes each night, what I fantasize about when I’m supposed to be engaged in meetings and Zoom calls. “Did you feel more aroused when you were trying to escape?”
She shivers and I smile beneath my mask.
“Answer me.”
“Yes, Sir.”
I hum thoughtfully as I dip my thumb into her mouth to tease the tip of her tongue. “You mentioned primal play before, as something you were curious about, yes?”
“Yes, Dominus.”
“Perhaps we should explore a predator and prey dynamic soon.” I stroke her hair and she leans into my touch, fuckingpreeningfor me like the good girl she is. Every moment I spend with her is a new surprise, a new discovery about who this woman is. I want to know everything. Not just who she is in here, with Dominus, but what makes her tick out there, in the world beyond the sanctity of The Rabbit Hole. I need her dreams and desires, her regrets, the things she wouldn’t even tell her very best friend.
I swallow as emotion lodges itself into my throat and grabs hold.
Fuck.
What am Idoing?
This can only end one way, and it has disaster written all over it. Trust is the key basis for a Dominant/submissive relationship, and I’m building this one on the biggest lie of all.
“Sir?”
I blink, realizing I’ve dropped my hand from her head to grip the armrest of my chair.
I haul in a deep breath and give myself a mental shake. If I’m going to do this, if I’m going to risk her hating me for the rest of our lives so I can have this secret, beautiful side of her, I have to let go of the dream of ever truly getting to know Sutton Hart, the ball-buster, and be grateful I get to know this intimate side of her, of Sutton Hart, the submissive.
I have to be thankful for the little bit of her I do get and let go of the rest, otherwise what I don’t have will eat at me until it taints what’s right in front of my face.
“On your feet.”
She rises quickly, standing with her head slightly bowed. She’s dressed in her skirt again, though barefoot now, and I run my hands down her arms, over her hips, memorizing the luscious curves of her body.
“Sensory deprivation,” I begin as I move away from her, “is the act of removing one sense to heighten the others. On your checklist, you markedsensory deprivation via blindfoldas a four.” I pull open a drawer on the opposite side of the room and retrieve an eye mask. “If you are available to stay with me for a little while longer, I’d like to test that rating.” Stepping behind her, I place my hand on her shoulder to keep the connection steady. “Speak freely.”
