“I know,” I sigh.
“Do you want me to come with you?”
I shake my head. “This is something I need to do on my own. It’s the last time I’ll see my father, and I want it to be just the two of us.”
“Okay,” she mumbles. “I’ll be here, then. Waiting.”
“I hear from Cove you’ve been doing a good job of handling being the boss.”
“Is it hard? Yes. I’m still trying to learn everyone’s names, but hey, I’m making progress. I’ve made sure Amy and Nelson are somewhere safe. Kaya is looking for Paul as we speak, and if anyone can get him, it’s her.”
“I’m surprised you’ve gotten so close to the Russian princess. She’s not the kind of person I’d imagine you spending time with.”
Blair shrugs. “Kaya’s a very good person to trust with these issues. She’s the definition of a man-hater, so I know she’ll get the job done. As far as us spending time together, well… let’s just say we have some things in common.”
I lift a curious brow. “I’m assuming you’re not going to tell me which things you have in common?”
“Nope,” she grins. “Now, finish your meal, and let’s go to bed. It’s late.”
“I’ll go tomorrow,” I announce, and Blair looks at me like I’d just slapped her.
“You’re going tomorrow,” she repeats the words slowly, as if she can’t believe it. “Okay. I’ll be right here, then.”
She has no idea how much it means to me, that I know that I’ll have someone to come home to. Someone of my own, who can share my grief and anger. Someone who will not judge me because tomorrow, I’ll have to see my father’s body. After that, I don’t know what is going to happen. Best case scenario, I come home. Worst case? Well, let’s just say that the anger I’m feeling is growing stronger. May the Lord protect those who dare to stand in my way, because I’ll spare none.
TWELVE
At this point, I can’t even tell how much time has passed. Was it a week? Two? A month? A whole year? I don’t know. It’s all going so quickly, and the results are not showing just yet. If I say that I’ve done everything in my power to track down Raven, only to help Arlo, I truly mean it. I’ve had no luck, and it’s irritating me that I can’t be of more help.
No matter how much I want to be there for Arlo, I can’t do that unless he lets me. He isn’t letting me. In fact, he’s completely withdrawn into himself, barely speaking, eating or talking. I have to almost pull the words out of his mouth. Despite drowning in his grief, he’s still as attentive as always. He’s always bringing me my favorite snacks, making sure to leave his scent lingering in the apartment because he knows it makes me feelmore secure, and every night, he holds onto me like he’s holding onto dear life.
“You can’t force these things, Blair,” Freya says, offering me a glass of wine. I decline with a shake of my head, slumping into the soft, plush sofa, staring into the ceiling.
“I know,” I groan, rubbing my temples. “I’m not trying to force him to talk to me. I’m trying to be patient, but I’m scared. He’s been pulling away from me more and more, and I don’t know how to go about this without being pushy or accidentally overwhelming him.”
Freya sips on her wine, staring out of the window. Spring is near, and all the coldness is slowly disappearing. The chilliness in the air promises a rather warm summer, and I’m uncertain whether or not to look forward to it. “Look, Blair, there’s one thing you could do, but that would be… how do I say this?” She pauses for a moment, pondering on the thought. “Evil on your side.”
“I’m listening.”
“You will leave.”
I blink. “Excuse me? Do you want me gone?”
She rolls her eyes — well, her eye. “Did I say that? No... Don’t put words in my mouth.”
“Then, please, elaborate,” I scoff, but I’d be lying if I said her words didn’t pique my interest. Freya puts her empty wine glass on the coffee table between us, then leans in, skimming my face thoroughly.
“From what I’ve figured out about you, you work best under pressure. So, leave. Without a word. Well, maybe just leavea note or something so Arlo knows you didn’t get kidnapped again.”
A frown etches on my face. “Why would I do that? It would crush him.”
“Yes, but you’d also be able to actually focus on finding Paul and ending him. Meanwhile, Arlo would focus on tracking down Raven and dealing with that. You have Ekaterina-fucking-Kalashnikova on your side. She’s faked her death once before, so she can definitely help hide you.”
“I don’t know about this,” I bite the inside of my cheek. “Wouldn’t it be… I don’t know, a little too much to just disappear and leave Arlo hanging?”
“He’ll get angry, and Arlo works best when he’s angry.”
“Why do I get the feeling you just want me out of the picture?”
