His words of encouragement are all I need. In an instant, I’m screaming out his name, feeling the burning ache in my lungs. My walls clamp down on him when the orgasm hits me, and I allow shameless, deep moans to fall from my lips.
“Fuck,” he mutters through the kiss, slamming into me one last time. He groans loudly, emptying himself deep inside of me, and holding me in place to ensure every single drop of his cum is in me.
He doesn’t pull out, instead, he rests his forehead against mine, eyes closed. Our breathing matches — labored, rough, and neither of us seems to find the words to say.
It doesn’t matter anyway, because tomorrow, when we go backto the Academy, both of us will pretend this never happened.
EIGHTEEN
It feels good to be back at the Academy.
I think I spent four hours in the bathtub, adding warm water whenever it would get cold. I’m definitely not cut out to be in the woods, or for any physical labor, because my sore muscles haven’t recovered just yet.
The bubbles, all essential oils, and body lotions smelled divine, and the fact that I finally got to do my hair care routine made all of the troubles vanish from my mind. It helped me relax immensely.
That is, until I remember what I did with Soren in the woods, and then all the emotions come back, flooding my mind. It was dirty, it was unhygienic, and it shouldn’t have happened. But it did. And that’s precisely why my first stop was Grace’s dorm, where I stole a day-after pill, just to cover my bases, until I go home and get on birth control.
Lila’s sitting on the bench of the small church beside me, her eyes closed, hands clasped in front of her as she prays. She’s dressed modestly, hiding her pink hair behind a black scarf. Her dress is long,reaching down to her ankles, and she pairs it with boots to match. It’s covering all the small tattoos she has on her arms, and the sleeves aren’t as skin-tight as the clothes she’d wear normally.
I’m not very religious. My parents are Christians, and they visit church every Sunday. Growing up, my older brother Sawyer and I went with them. We celebrate Christmas and all the holidays, though the religious aspect isn’t as big a part of my life as it used to be.
However, after what Soren and I did in the woods, I need God.
The mass is about to begin, and there are another twenty students around. It’s silent as we all take moments to pray, though I can’t help but squirming and look around. Lila notices it and opens her eyes, leaning in.
“Would you quit it?” She hisses in a quieter tone. “If you don’t want to be here, then don’t.”
“Sorry,” I mumble. “It’s been a while.”
She sighs, angling her body to look at me, while keeping her voice as low as possible. “Is everything okay? You never attend the mass.”
I bite the inside of my cheek, swallowing down the truth. “Yes, I just felt like I should probably try to reconnect with the religious part of me.”
She smiles. “If it’s meant to be, it will be.”
“You’re right.”
“Oh, the priest is coming,” she says, getting all giddy.
I roll my eyes. “At least now, I know why you’re always in the front row.”
“That’s not true,” she scoffs. “I’ve been attending Sunday mass long before he was appointed to this specific church."
“You do realize he’ll never look at you, right? He quite literally can’t.”
“Oh, he doesn’t have to,” she shrugs. “I’ll do all the looking.”
My eyes flick to the front of the church, a couple of feet away. The priest… well, he looks like a priest. A handsome one, though. From what I can tell, he’s in forties, with warmth in his expressions. And when he smiles, I can practically feel Lila melt beside me.
“Jesus Christ,” I mutter. “Behave.”
“I am,” Lila defends. “I’ll go to the confession booth after this.”
“I’m sure you will,” I drawl out. “At least make sure your tongue isn’t quicker than your brain. You wouldn’t want to call him daddy instead of father, would you?”
Lila bites her lip to prevent herself from bursting into a fit of giggles, then straightens up in her seat. The mass lasts quite a while — or maybe I’m not used to it, so it feels like an eternity passed by before the mass ends.
Lila’s the last one to go into the confession booth, chatting with other students, while keeping her eye out for the priest. She’s so in love with a man she can’t have, it’s almost painful to watch.
