His comment took my attention away from her name written on the packages as I looked at him. He saw us at the bonfire, he knew how I was starting to feel about her and how that conflicted with my responsibilities.
“Of course, it matters if sheliedto us.”
Everyone had started to fall in love with her, and I worried it would break all their hearts if she wasn’t who she said she was.
“I just mean,” Patrick continued, “does a name really make a person? Or do their actions define that? Can you honestly think back to how she has been the last two months and think any of that wasn’t genuine? The way she laughs with Mel and Liv, that’s not a lie. The way she gets her hands dirty with Grandma Trixie in the garden, you can’t fake that. Shelovesyour mom and their chats about books and that damn squeaky rocking chair on the deck.”
I chuckled slightly at the memory, Stella rocking back and forth while the chair made the most hideous noise. She was too absorbed in her book to notice until Garrett came up and sprayed a bit of WD-40, instantly fixing the problem. I had been too enraptured by her very being to disturb her, that creaky chair could have been the soundtrack to my life and I would have danced every day.
Patrick was right. She had never once shared her last name with me, and I had never asked, so I couldn’t say for sure that she had lied about her identity. And knowing what she was running away from, who was to say what her reasoning was for going by Stella instead of Crystal?
As far as I was concerned, she would be who she had always been to me. I wanted to make sure I could be what she needed in that moment, too. So I let go of all the negative feelings I had harboured since hearing her name and readied myself to hand hersome packages that I hoped wouldn’t destroy the happiness she had found while she had been in Love.
“Thanks, man, I really appreciate it,” I said.
There was a reason he’d been my best friend all these years. He had a heart of gold and a solid head on his shoulders. His reasoning couldn’t be argued with, and he drove the confidence in me that together, we could help Stella with whatever she was about to face.
Packages. Multiple of them sat on the table in front of me. Calvin’s family lingered around in the kitchen, watching me expectantly but also trying not to put too much pressure on me. My first instinct was to run and hide in my room, but I remembered Trixie’s advice of good food, good music, andgood companyfixing everything, so I decided to stay where I knew I’d be safe from my thoughts.
“Let’s get this over with,” I said, reaching for the first of four envelopes as I willed my hands not to tremble.
“Whenever you’re ready.” Calvin’s voice gently soothed me, reminding me to take a deep breath as I opened the sealed flap.
I already knew it wouldn’t be bills. Nick had never put my name on any rental or utility in all the time we lived together. He said it was because he could take care of me. But I now knew the real reason was so he could have more control.
In the first envelope, I slid out a few printed sheets of paper. On closer inspection, it was the lyrics to “Home”by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros.It was a beautiful song, one I still adored to this day. But it lost its merit of beingour songa long, long time ago.
My breathing evened out slightly. On to the next envelope. From this one, I pulled out another printed sheet of computer paper, but this one had a message he had typed out.
Only I can give you everything you’ve ever wanted.
It was a sentiment that was nowso farfrom the truth it made me laugh to read it. Maybe Icoulddo this. Maybe, after a couple months in Love, he didn’t hold as strong of a power over me.
I quickly ripped into the third one, less worried than I had been when I started. This last envelope had a handwritten note scratched on his office pad inside.
Whose yellow Jeep is that? That’s not the vehicle you stole from me.
That one made my heart skip a beat. It wasn’t a complete lie. The car I drove herewasmine. I had bought it and made payments on it all with my own money. But he had his name on it for our insurance package policy. It was mentioning Olivia’s yellow Jeep that had my heart sinking, though. The only time I had been in it was on our girls’ trip weekend to Saskatoon weeks ago. How had he known?
“What is it?” Calvin asked. He picked up and read the contents of the first two envelopes after I tossed them back on the table, but this one I still held clutched in my hand.
“I need to send my car back,” I decided. Now that it had been fixed, I was finding I had no use for it in this small town where everything was within walking distance. There was the farm’s pickup truck I could use, or I had someone to lean on to ask for help. I could always buy myself a new car, and I wanted to get rid of anything that tied me to Nick.
“I can help you, we can hitch it up this afternoon and take it to the dealership in the next town. I’m sure they’d give you a good price for it.” Calvin, always so sweet and trying to take on everyone else’s problems. But this was one I wanted to handle on my own.
I smiled at him and gently placed my hand on his. “I appreciate it, but I’ve got this one.”
There was a company I dealt with in Utah when I needed supplies hauled for whatever building I was working on, and they did a great job transporting across long distances. They would come pick up the car for me and deliver it right back to Nick. He could have it if he was so worried about it.
I eyed up the two boxes next. I wanted to get whatever was inside them done and over with.
I grabbed the first one. It was the heavier of the two and it sounded like there were loose parts inside as I picked it up and shook it.
Upon opening, I saw the watch I had gifted Nick for one of our anniversaries. Engraved on the back wasThis time and the next.It was a play on how he would tell me he’d find me in our next life. The watch was shattered into pieces—obviously to send me a message.
It brought back the memory of the original watch I had gotten for him. Because this wasn’t it, though he did shatter that one, too.
I spent weeks saving up for a beautiful Rolex I thought he would love. I had it engraved in the same way I did this one, and when I gave it to him, he only scoffed.
