“Well, no,” I said. “As far as all that is concerned, I have little thought on it at all. It sort of doesn’t matter what I think, anyway, because it is the way it is and no talking of it is going to change it.”
“I do not know if that is true. I think the first step in changing things is, indeed, talking of how it might be different,” she said. “But very well, we shall leave that. You have come upon some other errand, then.”
“I have come to plead the case for Miss Elizabeth Bennet,” I said. “I know you may have heard things about what transpired, but I wish to assure you that Miss Bennet was the wronged party—”
“Oh, dear,” said Lady Susannah. “What are you saying, sir? I have sent a letter to Miss Bennet telling her that I did not blame her at all and that after she recovers she must come back to see me.”
I gave her a slow nod. “Yes, she did indicate the letter said that, but she said also that she could read between the lines, so she does not seem to have taken it that way.”
“Well, I shall send another,” said Lady Susannah. “I have not heard the particulars, but you seem to be knowledgeable about it.”
“She was taken in by a snake of a man,” I said. “She defended herself when he sought to harm her, however, and she came out of it intact. Personally, I think, after going through that sort of ordeal, a woman should have a bit of time to collect herself, not be thrust into trying to sort out a marriage proposal immediately to protect her from ruin.”
“I agree,” said Lady Susannah. “Is that what she is doing?”
“I have offered for her,” I said.
“Oh,” she said, looking me over.
“Yes,” I said. “But there is another offer. I suppose this is selfish, but I cannot but think that Miss Bennet is in too muchof a difficult situation to think clearly at this point. I feel that if she could have the time and space to recover, she might come around to, well, to me, I suppose. This is why it’s selfish. So, I am come to you to beg you to reinstate her as your heir, not to shun her, for it was not her fault, and… and it may have been my fault, in the end.”
“Your fault?”
“I did not stop that snake of a man, but left him loose on the world. I knew what he was capable of.”
“Hmm,” she said, regarding me. “Hmm.”
I took a deep breath. “I know you have some opinion about marriage in general, or perhaps simply men. And I cannot entirely account for the faults of my sex, I must say. There are men who treat women abominably, and there are other men, men who are simply thoughtless and preoccupied with other things and who accidentally treat women badly. That may have been me on a number of occasions, if I am honest. I cannot beg you to change your entire view of us—”
“Mr. Darcy,” she said, shaking her head. “I have never intended to disinherit Miss Bennet. She has been my companion since she was but fourteen years old. She has been with me nearly daily. I would never abandon her because she was taken in by a man, of course. I also have never, ever indicated that she cannot marry. I hear that rumor all the time, but it is a falsehood.”
“I see,” I said. “I am sorry.”
“Truly, I would have married myself,” she said. “But I simply never did.”
“No?” I said. “I suppose it is none of my business why not, and I do not wish to pry.”
“Of course you wish to pry,” she said, sighing. “Everyone does. I was just looked over, I suppose. I had my time at the balls in London society. I danced with as many men as anyone, andI even had callers, and then no one ever got around to wanting me, I suppose.” She shrugged. “This, Trawlings, was some sort of latch-ditch effort on the part of my father to get me a match. By that time, I was rather firmly on the shelf, and I suppose I was bitter. I could have gotten married then. There were offers, but I turned them down.”
“Because you felt as if they were only offering for this estate and the income it would provide?”
“Because I was young,” she said. “Still young, then, only six and twenty, which is so young, even though people your age might not realize it. I was young, and my blood was hot, and I was hurt at being ignored for so long. I was so hurt that I acted against my own self-interests. I determined I should not take any of the attention I was getting, even though all I had wanted, all along, was attention.” She chuckled softly.
I supposed I saw what she was saying.
“I have no desire to stand in the way of Miss Bennet’s happiness,” she said. “But I have noticed, over the years, that there are certain advantages to being a woman like myself, a woman with her name on a deed of a piece of property, a woman who can financially support herself and a household of servants, a woman who is not reliant on any man. I do not think it is preferable, necessarily, to be an unmarried woman. However, I do think that if I could have imparted any wisdom to Miss Bennet, it would be not to rely on men, not if she does not have to. To learn to stand on her own, when she can, if she can.”
“She does that,” I said, smiling faintly. “She is so very self-possessed. There is some air about her, something that I cannot quite explain, but she is like a force of nature.”
“You are in love with her,” said Lady Susannah with a smile.
“I said I had offered for her.”
“Yes, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you care for her, as you well know.”
“I do,” I said.
“Well, that bodes well, then,” she said.
