I glared at him. “There I am, what?”
He glared back. “It’s very obvious.”
“Is it?” I lifted my chin. “It’s not as if we’d do… that.”
“Well, we would say that we wouldn’t,” he said. “And I think we’d mean it, but then we’d be there, all alone, and drinking quite a lot of tea and very wide awake in the midst of the night, in an inn, with nothing at all to do but evaluate the kissability of each other’s lips, and… and things would happen.” He squared his shoulders, nodding at me, his expression grim.
I touched my lips, feeling a little bit embarrassed and sort of shy and maybe a little pleased, except— “Mr. Darcy, you don’t even find me tolerable enough to dance with, let alone kissable.”
He drew back, eyes wide. “Oh, God in heaven. You overheard me at that ball.”
I sighed. “All right, yes, I did, and I would never have brought it up, but—”
“That’swhy you don’t like me.” He laughed. “I see. Of course. It’s all about your own pride, madam.”
I sputtered. “No, it is not. It’s about your arrogance, sir, your, well, prejudice, truly. You have these ideas about the way things should be, and you aren’t even willing to consider—”
“I didn’t even mean it,” he said, with a shrug, giving me a little grin, a sort of mischievous grin.
This unsettled me badly for no reason that made any sense. “You didindeedmean it.”
“Well, sort of,” he said with a shrug. “But really, it was better to say you were only tolerable than it was to say that I was tired of dancing with his stupid sister, Caroline Bingley, was it not? I don’t know, however, if you’ve noticed how difficult it is to be polite to that girl, though? She is…” He shook his his head, letting out an assessing breath. “Annoying.”
“Sir, you find me beneath you in every fathomable way—”
“Yes,” he said easily, shrugging. “Yes, you’re not the sort of girl I should dance with, Miss Bennet, but you’re really quite fetching. I was just thinking so this morning when you were walking. Richard and I came upon you there, and I thought about the way you were looking up into the sun like that, and I thought you were beautiful.”
I could not breathe. No one, no man, had ever called me beautiful. Not… maybe my father, but it wasn’t the same thing, not in the end, and this… he should not say things of that nature to me. I said nothing, unable to speak, shaking my head at him.
“Trust me, anyway, if we are stuck together in a room in an inn, I am going to find it tempting,” he said. “This is why I am wearing a cravat again.”
“What?” I said. “That doesn’t make any sense at all.”
“Yes, it does. Don’t you see? If I don’t follow propriety, I shall break it. If I break it, I shall… with you.”
“No, you won’t,” I said.
“I shall,” he said. “You’re pretty. I’m a man. There’s no one else. And there are no consequences to such a thing, so why not? If it’s Thursday every day, what could happen? You certainly can’t be gotten with child.”
I was shocked again.
“Anyway, no inns,” he said, clearing his throat. “Perhaps… we could attempt this tea experiment somewhere uncomfortable, like outside, around a fire, on the grounds of Rosings. While both wrapped in layers and layers—barriers—of blankets. Yes?”
I was still speechless.
“Oh, heavens, Miss Bennet, I would not do such a thing to you. Don’t be frightened.” He ran his hand through his hair. He was not looking at me. “I’m not that sort of man.”
“I suppose it would be easier on the grounds of Rosings,” I said in a quiet voice. “But you don’t actually want me in that way. You don’t find me—you are not drawn to me.”
“You really just don’t know anything about men, Miss Bennet,” he muttered. “Why do you think there’s so much care taken for propriety, anyway? Men are not to be trusted, not in that way.”
“That’s preposterous,” I said.
“Well, we shall take care,” he said, squaring his shoulders. “And I am not that sort of man.”
He was rather harping on that, wasn’t he?
fitzwilliam
