Julian rests his arm on the back of the couch, and his fingers ghost over the ball of my shoulder.
“Let’s talk, Angel.”
With a nod, I lick my lips and dive right into the deep end.
“What happened?”
He frowns down at me, so I elaborate.
“That day when—” I have to swallow and press my lips together. “What did I do that you thought was a betrayal? I know I met my father for lunch. He texted me the day before, when I was with the girls, and demanded that I meet him. I didn’t see you at all because you’d been working, and I was trying to be strong and handle it on my own. You shouldn’t have to fight all of my battles for me.”
“Christ,” he mutters and rubs his hand through his hair.
Should I stop talking?
Feeling brave, I keep going.
“I wanted to talk to you before I got there because I was scared, and I could have used some encouragement, but you hadn’t replied to my texts, and I didn’t want to distract you and put you in danger.”
His jaw firms, but his fingers are still gentle on my skin.
“It was not a good lunch.”
“I know,” he says at last, and I blink in surprise.
“You do?”
“Yes. I heard every fucking word.”
My stomach drops. “Wait, you heard what he said, and you still?—”
“No, I didn’t hear it until the day I found you.” His face is ashen as he starts to lay it all out for me. How he suspected there was a traitor in his organization, like he’d told me. How my necklace lit up when he scanned it.
My necklace.
And everything else that happened until the day Elliott found me in that pharmacy.
When he’s finished with his story, I’m crying again. Because all of this was a fuckingmisunderstanding?
“Where’s my necklace now?”
“In my office. I scrambled the feed to your father, and I can have it fixed for you, if you want.”
“I don’t want it. I want you to throw it away. Julian, you didn’t even ask me to explain myself. You just assumed?—”
“You’re right. I did. Natasha, the evidence was pretty fucking damning. It all pointed to you putting my entire family and organization at risk. Men that I respected and who put their lives on the line for me were killed because of information that only you could have been privy to. I don’t tolerate betrayal fromanyone.And I was hurt, okay? It fucked with my head that the woman I was falling for could have double-crossed me because I don’t let my guard down like that. I don’t letanyonein. My circle is real fucking small, so when I thought that the most important part of that circle had betrayed me, I?—”
“You freaked out,” I finish for him.
His shoulders sag.
“Yeah, I fucking freaked out. And I hurt you, andfuck, baby, that’s something I have to live with for the rest of my life. I’m ashamed, and the guilt has me by the throat. I’m a Mafia boss. I’m a ruthless piece of shit, and I’m not a good person. Except when it comes toyou. And what I put you through fucking kills me. I will never get over how you looked lying in that fucking room, so damn sick and small and practicallydying.”
“I wished for death often,” I admit with a small voice. “Because it would have been better than living without you.”
Finally, Julian gently tugs me into his lap, careful of my hands, and lies back so we’re snuggled up together on the couch, and this isexactlywhat I need.
“Please don’t ever say that again.” His voice is rough with emotion. “I’m so fucking sorry for everything that happened, and I will do whatever you need me to do to show you that I will protect you and never let anything like that happen again.”
