I exhaled, the memory boiling in my blood.
“On her birthday, I made the decision to finally claim her. That night, I officially stepped into my role as Capo and moved against Carmen. I waited two years to take what was mine, and instead of being grateful, Lucia humiliated me.”
My throat tightened, but I forced myself to say the rest.
“That cursed day... I found out she was pregnant. Eight months. Which meant she was already three months in when she ran. You know what kind of rumors that can start? People will say the kid might be mine.
They’ll laugh behind my back. Say I was too blind to realize my wife was pregnant. Or worse, that Tony had been fucking her right under my nose. Most assume the affair started after she escaped. But if the timeline gets out, my entire reputation is fucked. That’s why I lost it and—”
“And almost raped me.” Emily’s voice shut me up.I felt the color drain from my face, and my blood turn to ice.
Her eyes filled with pain as she went on. “You took what Lucia did and threw it at me. You couldn’t punish her, so you punished me. Instead of giving me the freedom you gave her, you locked me in this house, controlled every inch of my life. She betrayed you, and I paid for it. You never gave me a chance. Never let me show you I was different. That I deserved your trust. From the very start, you judged me like I was guilty of something I never did.”
I couldn’t look at her. My voice came out hollow, low. “You’re right.”
Emily’s voice trembled. “If you loved her so much, why did you openly sleep with other women in front of her? You even brought one of your whores, Aida, into this house. You didn’t care that everyone saw how unfaithful you were.”
After that first line, the rest barely registered. “Who told you I loved that whore?”
Emily looked genuinely confused. “You’ve been searching for her for months. You want to bring her back. You won’t even divorce her.”
I burst out laughing. She was so fucking naive.
“Oh, Emily,” I said, bitterness dripping from every syllable. “The feelings I have toward Lucia are nothing close to love or affection. Yeah, I want her back, but not for the reasons that innocent brain of yours thinks. I want her back to make an example out of her. I’m not divorcing her because I want to block her from marrying Tony and make their lives miserable. You’ve completely misunderstood.”
Another empty laugh escaped me. “And now, I’m even more determined. That slut drove me insane, and in my rage, I did something to you that I’ll never be able to undo. You’re right. I didn’t give you a chance. I didn’t see how different you were. I didn’t value your patience, your kindness.”
The words weighed heavier with each one that left my mouth.
“I’ve lost you,” I said, voice low and broken. “And it’s killing me, Emily.”
Her eyes filled with tears, she turned away, refusing to look at me. I got up and sat beside her. When I reached for her hands, she pulled away. That rejection fucking stung, but I didn’t stop.
“I know I messed up. There’s no excuse. No way to justify what I did. You hate me... and I don’t blame you.” I paused, the ache in my throat almost unbearable. “I wish I could go back. I’d take the pain from you and carry it myself.”
I reached into my jacket and placed the envelope on her lap. “I want you to live the life you deserve. Without me. I’ll lose my fucking mind without you, but I won’t…I can’t force you to want me again.”
I hesitated, the words catching in my throat. “I know you once did, didn’t you?”
Her tears broke loose, pouring down her cheeks. She raised a shaking hand to her mouth, trying to quiet the sobs, but the pain clawed its way out anyway. Her shoulders shook as her walls collapsed. I didn’t dare touch her.
I leaned forward, elbows on my knees, and buried my face in my hands, trying to breathe through the wreckage between us. Minutes passed before her cries softened.
When I finally sat up, I said quietly, “That envelope holds the deed to an apartment in one of the safest neighborhoods in Rome. I own the whole building. No one will get close without my permission. I’ll assign a team to watch over you.”
I leaned in slowly, hesitating before pressing a kiss to her shoulder. “Thank you for the moments we shared. Even if you never want to see me again, you have to know I’m still here. Whatever you need, I’m yours. I’m your family, like you’ll always be part of mine... Good luck, little lamb.”
I stared at her face one last time, memorizing every detail, the tear-streaked cheeks, the trembling lips, the sadness in her eyes, before forcing myself to leave. My steps felt heavy, like my feet were dragging the weight of finality. I was almost at the door when her voice stopped me.
“Carlo.”
I turned. She stood in the middle of the room, her face flushed, eyes still glassy with tears. Her hands trembled as she raised the envelope and threw it at me, her voice cracking with fury. “Do you really think I was your whore? That now you can throw money at me and send me away?”
My brows drew together. “You know very well that’s not what this is.”
Her voice shook as she fired back, “Isn’t it? You came here, poured your heart out, but not once did you apologize for what you did. Why would you? Like you said, we didn’t have a real relationship.”
A chill ran through me. My voice dropped, uncertain, raw. “If I apologize, will you forgive me?”
