He’s not controlling you.
He’s trying to protect you.
I turn to the side window again and keep quiet. I can feel the frustration knotting in my chest. I want to let it out like I always do, except I don’t. Not this time. But it’s a hard pill to swallow. I’ve been constantly overlooked my entire life by powerful men, my father being the main one. It sucks. I’ve been fighting to believe since childhood that I was strong, that I could be just as powerful as men like Charles Watson or Nikolai Rogov. It’s not easy to let go of that belief.
I want to believe that I have things under control, but what if I don’t?
I couldn’t even control my sexual desires when Nikolai walked into my apartment unannounced, seducing me with smoldering looks and dirty Russian words. I know now that Nikolai isn’t the enemy and that I can trust him, but it’s the principle of me surrendering completely to him that eats me alive.
The rest of the drive passes in tense silence, both of us lost in our own thoughts. By the time we pull into the underground garage of his building, the weight of our tension hangs heavy between us. I want to say something, anything to break through this wall we’ve built, but the words feel stuck in my throat.
I drop my bag onto the countertop when we make it back to Nikolai’s penthouse. It’s late in the evening, the orange lights of the city streaming in through the windows.
Nikolai exhales, rubbing the nape of his neck as he goes to fill two glasses of sparkling water from the tap. He hands me one and I snatch it from him.
“I didn’t mean to make you angry.”
“I know,” I exhale. “I’m sorry.”
He takes a gulp of sparkling water, then places it down on the countertop, watching me with a tight expression. Aftera minute of silence, he moves over to me and wraps his hands around my waist from behind, pulling me into him.
I consider wiggling out of his grasp, but the hug feels too good. It takes all of the tension out of my body without me even wanting it to. I sigh into his touch, feeling our bodies become one shape.
Before I have a chance to step away, he spins me around and brings me to his chest. It’s warm here, and the steady beating of his heart grounds me. As long as I feel his pulse, things are good.
“Need I remind you that we have a baby girl who needsbothparents alive?” He presses his forehead against mine, his hands locking around my hips. “We need to protect her. That is all that matters. Do you agree?”
My mouth pulls into a smile. “I’ll think about it.”
“That’s a start.” He smirks, his hand brushing against my ear as he curls a stray piece of hair behind it. The next moment, he closes the gap and pulls me into a kiss, his lips parting around mine in the most electrifying way.
A moment later, I’m melting like butter left on hot pavement during a heatwave. Sometimes I still can’t get over the effect he has on me.
God, this man…
I moan at the sensation, my eyelids fluttering closed, allowing me to let go of my need for control and concentrate on more pleasurable feelings. I’m pregnant. The last thing I need to feel is stressed, right? It’s not good for the baby.
Nikolai’s tongue hungrily penetrates my lips and enters my mouth, lightly wrapping around mine as his arms tug me closer. The kiss consumes me completely. I forget where I am. The only thing that exists is him, me, and the tiny life growing inside my belly. The tiny life that chose us to be her parents.
His hands go to my jacket like it’s second nature, pulling it off. Two piles of clothes gather on the living room floor as we unbutton and unzip one another’s clothes.
Moments later, both naked, we sink further into each other’s embrace, his hot skin against mine sending shivers up my spine.
I gasp when he lifts me up, gently throwing me over his shoulder as he starts down the hall. With my ass in the air, he takes the opportunity to slap it, eliciting another gasp out of me, this one higher in pitch.
We end up in the bedroom we have both been staying in for the past few nights. The sheets are unmade—making them would be a waste of time when we’re under them countless times during the day.
Without breaking the kiss, he gently lays me down on the bed.
I wrap my legs around his torso, needing to be as close to him as possible.
My core aches for this man in a way it never has before, desperate for him to get inside of me.
Nikolai lowers his mouth, trailing hungry kisses over my breasts, making sure to stimulate my nipples. I respond with a guttural moan, another shiver breaking out across my body.
Sweat begins to bead at my brow, forming thick water droplets. When I kiss him again, it tastes salty. Dammit, I’m so aroused by him I’m convinced I’d still be just as attracted to him if he smeared dirt all over his lips.
Nikolai teases a hand down my stomach, leading it further south. He pauses when he reaches the top of my mound, his finger poised, ready to venture further between my legs.
